


Sometimes

by madeofdaysix



Category: Day6 (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Childhood Friends, Cutesy, F/M, Fluff, Romance, Secret Crush, Warm and Fuzzy Feelings, all the good things inside
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-01-12
Updated: 2020-04-12
Packaged: 2021-04-23 00:54:01
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 9
Words: 23,314
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22229887
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/madeofdaysix/pseuds/madeofdaysix
Summary: It's easy to have a crush on someone — only ever get swooned by the little things they do. For Nina, she's always been in love with the little things about Jae, the political science guy who plays the guitar. His giggle that she heard across the room. His height is much taller in person than in photos. It's more of a silly crush, she'd say, but fate has made them cross paths.Nina, the photographer of her campus editorial board, is assigned to assist an interview with his band for a project. The meeting doesn't only ignite sparks between her and Jae but it has also brought a chance for her to rekindle a friendship with an old friend, Sungjin, who happened to be Jae's best friend and bandmate.
Relationships: Park Jaehyung | Jae/Original Female Character(s), Park Sungjin/Original Female Character(s)
Comments: 14
Kudos: 31





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This was originally a one-shot fic which was posted on my tumblr of the same name. I had the inspiration to continue this story because one of my readers told me so. I really appreciate the feedback. Let's see where this is going, shall we?
> 
> Thank you for reading!
> 
> twt: madeofd6

Sometimes she scrolls through her phone just to check on him. The political science guy who plays the guitar; always posting clips of himself playing guitar and silly content that she couldn’t comprehend yet amusing to see because… he’s cute anyway.

Sometimes she’d take a second glance at him when they pass by each other in the library or by the cafeteria. Then, she takes a mental note of how he’s taller than he looks in photos, he wears glasses for fashion, and… he has the cutest giggle. 

Sometimes she wonders how it feels like to be in the same proximity, talking to him or just listens to him talking – or by luck, she could listen to his cute giggle.

_ Ha. _

She guessed it’s true when people said to be careful of what we wish for. Now she’s going through thousands of regrets and theories to why would she have the slightest thought like that. Why would this silly thought come true when there are other thoughtful hopes and dreams (not to mention, the ones that hardly come true) exist?

Walking inside an air-conditioned studio after walking for 10 minutes from the other building under the scorching hot weather is nothing but an absolute bliss. She didn't waste a second to start setting up all the filming equipment from placing the tripod, camera, a designated chair for the interviewee despite none of her colleagues and the interviewee were in sight just yet. It’s not because she’s feeling productive (she wishes) but she’s trying to warm herself up – no, it’s definitely not because of the cold temperature of the secluded area. 

* * *

1 day ago

_ Editorial Board Team chat group _

_ Head Editor: _

_ We need to do an interview with the performer for the fundraising concert tomorrow. I rented the recording studio. Make sure to be there at 3. Send me the transcript by tomorrow’s night. _

_ Me: _

_ alright. I will bring the camera_

* * *

She reread last night’s conversation and couldn’t believe how fast she replied. Of course, she couldn’t deny the fact that she did it out of excitement – meeting the guy of her ‘sometimes’ thoughts, yes sure why not. 

“You’re a funny girl, sis,” she blurts out, directing it to herself. She adjusts the tripod stand and bringing it further back, imagining if the guy’s tall and lanky figure could fit into the frame.

A wide grin naturally curves on her face.

_ Stop it, you look stupid. _

“So, do I sit here?”

Startled by the voice, she pulls her sight away from the screen. _ It’s him. _He is wearing a soft pink shirt paired with a light washed denim jacket and light blue distressed jeans, completing the look with a pair of white sneakers. A guitar case hangs on one side of his shoulders. Anyone can tell he’s the type to put some effort into his everyday looks – today is no exception.

“Well, supposedly but – you know what, you can just sit there while waiting for the others,” she says, trying to sound composed. 

He grins, flashing that soft smile she’s been wanting to see up close. Without much ado, she readjusts the position of the camera as he walks into the frame. He pulls out his guitar strumming to whatever melodies that cross his mind. _ What a sight. _Her finger naturally presses the capture button as she watches him playing with his guitar from the screen.

“Jae,” she echoes, causing him to be distracted. “The mic, can you hold it for a second?”

She records the moment once Jae holds the microphone clip. 

“How do you know my name?” he spoke into the mic, eyes looking straight into the camera. She freezes on her seat. When she looks at Jae, she realizes Jae isn’t looking at the camera, but he is looking at her. Jae flashes a curious look, anyone can tell he’s interested in the answer. At this point, she isn’t sure if it’s his intention to be cooperative of the mic check or something else. 

“Well, it’s my job to know who I work with,” she shrugs her shoulders.

“Makes sense,” he gives a smug look.

For a moment, she feels like she has just successfully skipped a puddle but not until he mentions her name – she is confused. Now, it’s her turn to be curious.

“Did I get that right?” Jae asks but his expression shows he’s confident he gets the name right and asking that question is just unnecessary.

Before she could even ask him the same question he asked earlier, her colleagues barge in with the other band members. They naturally fill in the spaces while both of them remain on their seats. Their focuses are averted now. She could only sit there, wondering how he knew her name throughout the whole process of the interview. 

In between these thoughts, she, perhaps, has missed those stealing glances and cheeky smile he has on her when she’s zoning out – knowing very well what’s on her mind.

His ‘sometimes’ thoughts come into his mind suddenly;

Sometimes he wonders if she notices all his stolen glances on her when she passes by the common room during his debate practice or when his eyes naturally follow her every time she’s around – taking photos by the building where his lectures were. Sometimes he wonders what’s on her mind when she takes photos of her surroundings, looking focused and immersed in her subjects.

What if he’s the subject of the day? What does she think of him now? 

It was hard for Jae to read her, not that he’s good at it either, but he hopes he played it cool. Guessing her name? Yes, he sure doesn’t sound like a creep who looked up stuff about her. 

_ You’re cool, man _ . _ You did good. _

Jae assures himself. In his defence, he only looked up for her name and major in social media. Now, how will he explain he checked his friends’ following list without sounding like a dedicated stalker? Whatever, maybe he will suddenly come to the epiphany that he did play himself rather than to play it cool.

Then, what?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is quite short since it's basically the altered version of the one-shot but please look forward to the next few chapters!


	2. Chapter 2

The recording studio is small, there isn’t much space for them to walk around other than the audio room, audience seats and the stage platform. The band put their instruments somewhere where the audience seats are. They'll be heading for practice after the interview. They're supposed to have one before the interview but Jae had a replacement class, but it was postponed. He has no complaints on that.

Once they are seated, Jeongyeon, the interviewer, is giving them a briefing about the content while Mark will be monitoring the questions. 

“Sorry, it’s for our social media. You guys can continue...” she walks quietly near the platform as she points the camera lens at them. Everyone is listening intently to the briefing. She takes a few shots of them as a whole, and individually. By default, Jae is given the privilege to have more photos captured. 

Jae turns to her camera all of a sudden. His lips slowly curves into a smile before he turns back to the group as if nothing happened; as if he didn’t just take her breath away with that smile alone.

It’s unfair how someone can truly make your heart somersaults, explodes, and blooms all at once. She’s not used to this kind of novelty which raises the question, is this really just a silly crush and admiration? Then, what can love do? 

Having the experience to work for gigs, this kind of situation is normal. Some people love to pose. They love the lens and she’s more than happy to capture them. But this is something else.

“Thank you,” her hands are sweating, her legs are wobbly. If she waited any longer, she might pass out.

She returns to her seat, adjusting the camera to its original position while her mind is still on cloud nine. 

_ You’ve been in love before, many times. This is nothing new. It will go away. _

* * *

It's nice to have a group of passionate people on the set, anyone can tell these people are genuine about their shared interest; music. The interview is some chaotic experience though, full of banter and inside jokes among themselves. 

At first, everything is fine with Younghyun, the business major bassist, taking over the interview like the spokesperson he is. She doesn’t know much about him except maybe for the fact that her friend, Ayeon, is very into him. A good-looking foodie who likes to post photos of even better-looking meals on a regular basis. He has a resting bitch face and feline eyes that could make anyone begging on their knees, seeking forgiveness for the sins they did. Maybe he's not much of a hearty, huh.

Sungjin, the leader and guitarist, would nod in approval and put some of his thoughts into the conversation. He would look over the other members, signaling them to take part. He's acting like the responsible, affable leader he is. Mr. Always Right. Mr. Only Listens to Himself. People don't see that in him, maybe these boys do. No, obviously, she doesn't hate Park Sungjin. 

The other three members look like they are conspiring against who makes the wittiest remarks by goading others’ answers. Wonpil, the keyboardist seems to be the quiet one during the first few minutes, later he would exchange glances with Jae then they laugh over nothing. That's the kind of bond they have. They are in their own world. 

Jae, _ goodness Jae. _

It’d be more satisfying for her to say it out loud. She hasn’t fully recovered what happened earlier, but she moves on. She has to. If looking at him directly is too much of an admiration, looking at him through the display screen is not helping either.

His structurally disheveled hair. The way his eyes crinkle when he bursts into soft giggle. The way his eyes turn to the camera when he feels conscious. When he looks at the camera, it feels like he's looking at her. He blinks his eyes too much, and that the cutest thing that one can have as a habit. This, of course, only applies to Park Jaehyung.

She can’t bring herself to pay attention to the interview when her eyes are glued on him. Her hands are itching to zoom in on his perfect face, but she remains in control.

This is a blessing and she deserves to devour every second of it. They are in the same breathing space, who would've thought. She has had an idea of making something out of this. A friendship, maybe? Just to make her existence known to his world or some sort. But how? And at what cost? 

She pulls out her phone from her pocket, taking a photo of the stage platform — purposely letting Jae fill in the frame but not too obvious. This should be enough to be kept as a memory. She captions it with 'working' and posts it on her story. Not long after, her phone is bombarded with questions and exclamations from her friends inside the chat group. 

* * *

Jamie: SISSSSSSS! Did you talk to him?

Ayeon: Younghyun is cute, what's new?

Jamie: Tell us everything tomorrow xoxo

* * *

She slipped back her phone into her jacket pocket. Mark is sitting behind her and she doesn’t want him to get the wrong idea.

The boys are still bantering now, though. It's almost as if they share the same brain cells to function; once the other starts throwing a remark, the rest of them follow. Sungjin, who seems to hold himself accountable, just starts losing it too. Dowoon, who seems to be the listener, somehow brings out the best laugh once he opens his mouth. Naturally, everyone gets back to the interview and the cycle repeats. 

Boys.

The interview finally concludes after almost half an hour. She tries to keep herself busy with her device, waiting for the other to leave the studio. But none of her colleagues nor the band members have left yet. Some of them are stretching and some pulling weird slapstick. They are chit-chatting among themselves. They are all from the same circle of friends after all. 

On second thought, maybe she should leave rather than let herself be the only lone, awkward turtle in the room. Her feet feel heavy at the sight of Jae being in the same room as her.

“Good?” Jeongyeon, her colleague approaches her to review the footage, “Make sure to send it to the editing team by today,”

“Will do. They need that extra day to spare their half an hour,” she blurts, slowly packing all the equipment.

“I know, right? Those crackheads...,” Jeongyeon rolls her eyes.

“Thank you so much for having us here, by the way,” Younghyun greets the girls with a sincere smile. Maybe he’s not as cold as he looks, he could be as hearty as his meal is. Ayeon needs to know about this. There’s something about the way he carries himself that makes him look classy.

“No worries. Oh, have you guys seen each other before?,” Jeongyeon wraps her arm around Nina with a proud smile. 

She looks at Younghyun, who was looking at her. _ I have seen his Instagram before, I guess. _

“Anyways, this is Nina. The woman behind the camera, our powerhouse,”

“I hope the editing goes well though,” Sungjin adds. Nina is taken aback for a second but Sungjin remains unfazed. She takes it as a friendly gesture — with this man, there should be different stages of doubt. 

“We’re rooting for you, Nina,” Younghyun raises his fists up with the most supportive expression he could give.

“Actually, I’m just substituting, but I will let them know,”

“She’s with Jaebum,” Mark referring to another photographer in the team. 

“If you need bomb-ass photos, she’s the one,” he adds. She turns her back to look at Mark but she's surprised to see Jae sitting across her; beside Mark. She drags herself to face the front immediately out of embarrassment. 

The awkwardness slowly creeps inside her body. Has Mark always had this sweet and supportive side of him? The band seems to look impressed, and she feels like she needs to say something in return but her mouth and brain are malfunctioning. 

To Jae, Mark's remark is something he's heard before. Jaebum insisted this one girl to be in his team which says a lot, considering how critical and meticulous Jaebum is about his work. Jaebum had shown her portfolio, it was impressive nonetheless. Jae didn't expect it to be the same girl, but today, Mark just confirmed that. 

“So, you'll be at the concert?” Younghyun asks.

“Yeah, I'll be covering the concert and stuff. I can share some copies to you guys, no problem,”

“That’s great! We’ll be on the lookout, then,” Jae breaks out with the brightest grin. With that being said, she’s feeling more dedicated than ever. Thanks to Mark, her presence has bestowed on Jae’s sight. She’s already looking forward to the day they cross paths again.

“Oh yes, I didn’t introduce myself. I’m Younghyun from the business department. These are our bandmates,” he introduces himself before he gestures to the others to introduce themselves. 

By names and faces, Nina has already memorized them - thanks to Jae’s feed. But she gains new information that most of them are not from the same department which is pretty interesting. At least from what she knows, Wonpil and Dowoon are the only members from the music department; music composition and music performance respectively. 

Wonpil is much more reserved than she thinks, he's quiet and only talks when he needs to. He’s probably the type to open up to his close ones. Dowoon is the shy one, he seems young — probably a freshman. He's the embodiment of viridity. Everyone seems to be doting on him like a newborn baby. 

“I’m Jae from political science. Pleasure to meet you," he cranes his head closer with a cheeky smile. They know each other's names, but they still introduce themselves. This is cute. It's like sharing a little secret. It's great, the solid foundation has been made and the rest will fall into place, Jae thought. 

"I'm Nina, nice to meet you too. Common room frequent?" it's nothing new, the common room is the unofficial debate practice room. She's just saying it as it is. 

"Yes, sir. Where else could we possibly be?" his eyes just radiate at the mention of common room. It's the only place where everyone can be critical and fight the odds. He holds a great pride on it, that's for sure. 

Now the only one left is the leader which she definitely refuses to look forward to. Again, she doesn’t hate Park Sungjin. There are days when she doesn’t feel like being associated with him. 

“What?” Sungjin asks as everyone else is looking at him, anticipating. “Don’t mind me,”

“So, you guys know each other?” Younghyun asks.

“Kinda, I guess," Nina shrugs her shoulders. 

"Well enough," Sungjin answers nonchalantly. 

_ Oh. _

She hopes no one tries to bring out the question on how they know each other because she doesn’t know how to explain that. She doubts Sungjin has an answer to that. She knows Sungjin won’t answer it unless it’s decided by mutual agreement.

“Huh? That’s new,” Wonpil mumbled. Clear enough, Sungjin hasn’t spoken about her to anyone in this room because they seem surprised. 

There is a gleam of interest in Jae’s eyes. The casual exchange proves that they might be closer than what he thinks. He doesn’t expect his friend to know Nina, considering Sungjin has never once talked about her. He’s sure that they don’t even follow each other on social media either - though he’s aware that no one needs ‘following’ as a validation of a human relationship, but that could have been a sign.

If Sungjin is just a friend, then maybe he could be the catalyst to Jae’s pursuit. Although, Sungjin is definitely one of a kind; protective, secretive and all things secured. His detective sense is tingling but he’s afraid of being misled by assumptions and his own misjudgement.

Nina cut a glance on Jae, who has been looking at her with an intense gaze. He looked away almost immediately while adjusting his glasses. _ Oh no. _ What if Jae thought Sungjin and her were something _ something _? It can’t be.

“So, anyone’s up for lunch at the cafe? I’m starving,” Sungjin asks, switching the conversation that he has no intention to elaborate. 

He gives Nina a look. He's still the same Sungjin she knows. Mutual agreement. 

Jae saw that but he let it slide. 

* * *

Had the academic consultation been canceled, she wouldn't have missed lunch yesterday. God is truly trying to knock some sense on her, she thought. There's no way she could have reached another milestone in a day. But she's thankful for the inclusivity to have her for lunch. 

It's really not helping when she had seen some of them posted a group photo from yesterday's lunch. She spots the vacant seat next to Jae, opposite of Jeongyeon. That could have been her seat, she muttered in frustration. 

"Out of all days, it had to be on that day. You know you could have taken a rain check," says Jamie. 

"She's not us. She won't do that," Ayeon chirps in. Nina told her about Younghyun and she freaked out. Ayeon was worried about admiring a total jerk that she asked Nina to do some evaluation on him. Now, she's determined to go to the concert and talk to him. 

"By the way, what is it you want to talk about? Something Jae said?" Ayeon continues. 

"This is going to sound ridiculous but he knows my name. I literally heard it. I don't know how but yeah,"

Jamie and Ayeon stare at her, waiting for her to say the ridiculous part. Then, the realization finally hits Nina. 

"Isn't that shocking?" sometimes she forgot Ayeon and Jamie are social butterflies. They don't get shocked over trivial things like this. They know people around them. Those people know these two girls too. 

"Well, if it helps… maybe you caught his attention," Jamie creeps a smile. 

Nina snorts at her answer. "That's nice to hear, thank you,"

"Or maybe he knows you from someone? Oh yes, Sungjin?" Ayeon snaps her fingers when the name rings a bell. 

"You think Sungjin has said something about me to them? Why?"

"It's just a guess,"

"Why would Sungjin talk about me? For the record, we haven't talked to each other until yesterday. The shocking part is that it's the only time he didn't pretend he didn't know me,"

"Look, honey. Whatever the reason is, at least Jae recognizes you now. Next time, you see him — try to talk to him, " Jamie reminds her. Nina wishes she has that confidence and bravery to just talk to anyone without having the fear of being forgotten. 

"What if Sungjin happens to be there? Do I talk to him first or…"

"I don't know what it is about that guy that you're so careful about and have to make it about him, but if the whole group is there, then just say hi and blend in," Jamie explains. 


	3. Chapter 3

With the help of Dowoon's impeccable magnetism of being his lecturer’s favourite, the band are allowed to make use of the rehearsal studio in one of the music department buildings for all they want. They have been practically living in the studio every evening on weekdays and weekends ahead of the fundraising concert - churning every piece of songs multiple times but not enough to get sick of it; they never get sick of it.

Jaebum, Jeongyeon, come in with food and beverages in their hands while they’re lounging around on the floor and the couch. Jae takes a second glance when he notices Nina joined them. They had a meeting before they came here or so, Jae heard. Nina gracing the studio with her presence isn’t part of the scenario he imagined, but it’s fine. This might be the best time to get to know her better. Jae and Dowoon push the couch to the wall to make more space for all of them to sit on the floor. Everyone moves to sit in a circle while some of them arrange the food — a bucket of fried chicken, burgers, french fries pile to one big bag, and drinks. 

Nina sits in between Jae and Jeongyeon. She smiles at him. He nods, acknowledging her presence. She’s struggling to suppress how panicked she is at how physically close they are. But her eyes can’t keep it off him, still. Her brain is taking a mental note on how Jae is looking cute and snuggly in his black hoodie paired with black jeans and sandals. It’s unusual. He has his hood covering his head, almost hiding his whole side profile, and some strands of his unkempt hair are picking through. She has never seen this side of him; it's endearing and it almost seems like she’s being allowed to gradually take a few more steps into his world. 

"I'm sorry, do I look like that much of a mess?" Jae says sheepishly, pulling the hood to the back to get a better view. He says it so softly, almost drowned by the loud chatter resonating across the room. She hesitates for a moment, assuming Jae was talking to Wonpil, who is beside him. She looks at him, who is definitely looking at her.

"No, you look fine," she claims with a convincing tone.

_ Actually, you look mad cute._

"By the way, how was the practice so far?" she continues, hoping to drag the conversation longer. 

"It's good. Thank you for asking. I mean, we don't really have much time to grind but we're good. We have each other," he cut a glance to his boys who are very into whatever they have on their plates. There's a pride and gratitude in his smile, he treasures the boys. Her eyes travel where his eyes are looking; the boys. 

"That’s great. By the way, how did you guys meet? I mean, only some of you are studying in the same school," she asks, referring to Wonpil and Dowoon. 

"Good question. It all started during our first year. Sungjin, Wonpil, and Younghyun already kinda had it together. We had this music workshop every semester so we met there. It was my first time joining, though. It's funny cause it's kind of like fate. They were the first bunch I noticed & somehow the instructor told me to join them. After the whole workshop thing, we kinda like 'okay, we can make something out of this' but we had no drummer..."

"Then, I introduced them to Dowoon — my roommate, a freshman that time," Wonpil suddenly interrupts. Both Jae and Nina are so immersed in the conversation, they don't even realize Wonpil is listening too until he speaks up. Wonpil, the quiet one, seems to not mind talking to her. That’s a good thing to take note of.

"True. That boy is like the last missing puzzle. So, Wonpil told us to come and see Dowoon play. We heard him playing drums outside the studio and we were like 'okay, seal it'," Jae explains. The three of them avert their gaze on the said person, Dowoon. At first, Dowoon is minding his own business before he finally feels those eyes on him. The tip of his ears slowly flushing red. Jae bursts into a giggle at the sight of his fellow member. 

“To answer your question, yes, we still told him to play once we’re inside,” Jae explains as though he reads her mind. Wonpil excuses himself to go to the washroom.

"He's cute, a bundle of joy but a beast on stage," Jae giggles, still having the smile of adoration on his face. Realizing she has been staring at his face for too long, she looks away to her unfinished meal. 

"That's pretty cool," she murmurs, but clear enough for him to hear. Then, she continues, "It's like you never know who and how you're going to end up doing things with. Sometimes it might be easier with someone you just know,"

When there’s only silence in between the conversation, she glances at him only to meet his eyes already fixed on hers. He's looking at her with his back against the couch, amused. She raises her eyebrows, questioning. 

"I concur. That’s very quote-able, by the way.” he giggles. “So, how do you end up doing things with these people?" Jae asks, not moving his gaze on her. She looks away in embarrassment, pretending to be into her food as if her stomach isn't churning with butterflies. 

She clears her throat, taking her time to recall, "Last semester, I was looking for something to do, then I found out about this club during the open day. I met Jeongyeon and Mark. They were looking for a photographer. So, I signed up,"

"It's weird that we didn't get to know each other earlier, huh?" Jae furrows his eyebrows. 

The first time he saw Nina was when the editorial team was having a meeting in the common room. He was waiting for Mark after his lecture finished. Nina was one of the unfamiliar faces in the room. He assumed she was one of the new members out of the bunch. Since then, his mind seems to automatically recognize her face that his eyes always find their way to her wherever she is nearby. He had no idea why, but he was curious. Jae never got to know her name. Sure, he had heard several anecdotes from his friends — some unfamiliar names were mentioned during the conversation but he never cared enough to match the name and their faces. It was only until the day Jeongyeon told them about the interview that he had the urge to look for her name.

"That's because I've only been active this year — like joining programs and meetings. But It's true, we could've known each other earlier," 

But they didn't. Had she known Jae earlier from the gigs, she might not be as head over heels as she is now. It wouldn't be the same as when she fell in love with how enthusiastic Jae was when he's doing things he loves; games, debates, and music. It wouldn't be the same as when she notices how silly he was with his friends. It was to the point where she wanted to get to know him, become friends, and get silly with him. The old Nina would be too afraid to possess even the slightest infatuation towards anyone. She built her walls too high for anyone to climb over. In retrospect, she hadn't fully recovered from _ that day _ just yet to venture into something new. It didn't registered entirely into her mind that it was all in the past. Her decision to join the club was an escape for her. It was meant as a distraction, then she met Jae. It turns out to be part of the healing process for her too.

"Well, at least, we're finally here. Together... in this space. So, you made a good choice," he has no idea why his brain emphasizes 'together' but he likes it. The depth of the meaning is, however, remains unclear but he's willing to dive in deeper. 

"We did. I'm looking forward to seeing you more often after this," she answers happily, not ignoring how Jae is making her think with his choice of words. The word 'together' is enough to make her feel thrilled. The long gaze on each other is making her feel hot and sweaty. For a moment, it feels like there is no one else in the room except them. 

"I'll be honored," he says gently with a hinted smile, almost feels like a whisper. She blushes at the intimacy.

The rest of the night is spent on introducing Nina to everyone by giving away the other’s embarrassing stories because they believe these moments solidified who they are in person. Some of them are still traumatized, it seems. Wonpil is pulling his hair and screaming in frustration when they start bringing up that one time he made a questionable choice in fashion. 

* * *

Everyone decides to call it a night once the time passes 11. The night has grown darker, hardly a single soul is seen around the campus considering they are still in the first few weeks of the semester. No one bothered to roam around the campus buildings, staying up to catch the deadline...yet. They bid each other goodbye once they reach the common building before moving in separate ways. The boys walk in a group to the dormitory while off-campus students, Sungjin, Jaebum, Jeongyeon and Nina, walk in the opposite direction to the parking lot.

"See you guys later. Rest well," Jaebum waves before Sungjin and him go downstairs to the lower level of the parking lot. Sungjin waves at Jeongyeon. His eyes move to Nina momentarily before exchanging nods awkwardly. 

"Thank you for having me, though. I had fun," Nina thanks Jeongyeon once they both get into Jeongyeon's car. 

"You're one of us now," she smiled at her through the rear view mirror. Jeongyeon and Nina live a few streets away from each other's buildings — 15 minutes away from campus. It didn't take them too long to find out since the day Jeongyeon offered to give her a lift home during Nina's first day working with them after hours. 

"So, fancy anyone there?" she asks Nina. She glanced back to see if the other person was paying attention.

"Well," Nina scoffed, "They're all nice,"

Jeongyeon chuckles in amusement, "If you fancy any of them, be prepared. They can be...frustrating. At least, some of them,," 

"What do you mean?" 

_ Is Jae included?_

Jeongyeon pauses for a moment, contemplating to continue, "Well, let’s see. I don’t know why I’m telling you this, but first, can I ask you something,"

Nina nods eagerly.

The car stops as the traffic light turns red, Jeongyeon turns her attention to Nina, looking slightly stern and concerned or maybe it’s all just in Nina’s head. Overthinking. “I don’t mean to be nosy but you and Sungjin. You guys are friends?”

_ Oh... _

At that moment, the 15-minutes ride home seems to be taking forever. She musters calmness as she answers, “Yes?”

“Yes?” Jeongyeon imitates, raising one of her eyebrows. 

“We’ve known each other since we were kids if that helps,” Nina explains. Once the light turns green, she feels slightly at ease.

"I see. So, Sungjin and Nayeon kinda have a thing, but they couldn’t DTR - Sungjin couldn't. I'm sure he wants it but I’m not sure what’s going on. I mean, he's not one to leave people hanging like that. Well, I’m not in a place where I could just interfere. I’m not blaming everything on him, obviously. They’re both my friends so yeah,"

Sungjin is definitely not that kind of person. She recalls him as someone who knows what he wants and will follow whatever his heart wants. Nina had known him since their early adolescence days — bonded by days of playing in the dirt and flushed cheeks to days of figuring out oneself and puberty crisis. Sungjin was always as gentle as someone would wish for someone else. He's not the type to ask for harmful things for someone even when they deserve it. He's too kind for his own good. As she continues to reminisce, there's a big hole in the timeline; somewhere in the middle. Blank. Pitch black. A void. 

“I see. How long has it been? if you don’t mind,” she responds quietly. 

“Since freshman year, but things get complicated last semester,”

“I see,”

_ Could it be? _

Coincidence or not, the timeline seems to fit. That was when shit happened between her and Sungjin. She swore to never see each other again but fate has a better plan for both of them. They bumped into each other when she enrolled into the university last semester. She ignored him. They stopped talking at one point. Fate seems to have a better plan for them yet now that they met again while still acting like strangers. No, she’s the one who has been treating him like one when Sungjin came forward claiming they knew each other. Was the treatment out of remorse? Disappointment? She had no idea. It’s a selfish and immature move. It’s only about time they talk to each other again.

_ Poor guy. _

They finally arrive in front of Nina’s apartment facade. Nina looks at Jeongyeon one last time, “I’m not sure if it helps,” she chuckles. "As long as things are going well, just give him more time...or Nayeon can try showing her concern and ask him about it. I think he will appreciate that," 

"I'll think about it. Thank you," Jeongyeon answers firmly. 

"Thank you so much for today. See you tomorrow," Nina waves at her as she watches Jeongyeon’s car disappear from her sight.

That's rich coming from her, Nina thought to herself as she approached the elevator. Yes, he will appreciate that, you know it. But have you talked to him yourself, Nina? Have you tried to talk about it with him instead of running away and pretending like strangers? 

Both Ayeon and Jamie are sleeping in their rooms when she arrives home. She quickly showers and changes into her pyjamas. When she finally settles on her bed, she picks up her phone. A few notifications pop on her screen. The boys are following her on social media. Her eyes automatically glued to a particular username. She screamed soundlessly underneath her pillow to not wake her friends up. She re-checks her phone to confirm.

_ @eajpark (Jae Park) started following you. _

  
  
  
  
  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry that this took awhile because I was having a two-week trip. I might post the next chapter within the same week since I have them written halfway before I decided to write this chapter (lol). Happy reading!


	4. Chapter 4

Today, Nina spends her time at the usual cafeteria with the editorial members while waiting for a meeting prior to the concert at 2 o'clock. She’s been working on her academic papers over the past few days. It’s quite uneventful, to be honest. The relationship process between her and Jae has been stagnant too.

Speak of the devil. 

Jae, and Wonpil come over to their tables not long after. Jae sits on the chair on the other table where Jaebum, Mark, Jeongyeon are sitting. Jae goes straight talking with the rest of them, thinking Nina wouldn’t want to be bothered. At least, he smiles at her and maybe that will do, he thought. On other hand, Nina feels slightly bummed by that. It takes her awhile to process Wonpil’s presence sitting opposite of her.

“Oh, Sungjin is here too,” Wonpil chirps.

Nina trails over the direction Wonpil is looking at. She glances over the vacant seat next to her before she quickly shifts her attention to her laptop. Sungjin sits on the chair next to her, eyes looking over her laptop. Unknowingly, she has been looking at him through the reflection on her desktop screen. Neither Nina nor Sungjin look at each other as if the other doesn't exist. Jae is too busy talking to a friend he bumped into. Wonpil is giving both Sungjin and Nina a good stare — analyzing.

Nina gives him a look, insinuating him to stop. Wonpil has the audacity to smile at her as though he finds out something. “You guys have classes after this?”

Sungjin and Nina wait for each other’s response. When there’s none...

“No-”

“Ye-”

Both Sungjin and Nina give contrasting answers at once. Wonpil is amused as he carefully enjoys the interaction of ‘two friends who claimed to know each other well enough. Sungjin signals her to answer first.

She clears her throat, easing the tension, “We just whiling time until meeting, yeah,”

“I have. At 2,”

Wonpil feigns interest, he makes it very clear about it. “That’s interesting,”. If only she could just pull him into a headlock. Sungjin remains unbothered — knowing if he witnesses any expression Wonpil is pulling right now, he’d lose his patience.

“What are you guys talking about?” Jae joins in.

“You have classes after this?” Wonpil repeats his question.

“Yeah?” Jae answers. “Why?”

“Just asking,”

“Okay?” Jae looks at Nina, hoping for some enlightenment. Nina shrugs her shoulders.

Sungjin raises from his seat, taking out his wallet from his back pocket. “I’m gonna buy something, you guys need anything?”

“I’m fine,” 

“Me too,” Jae turns to Nina who seems to be occupied. “How about you?” 

Wonpil widens his eyes. He feels Sungjin’s stare piercing through him without having to look at his friend.

“Me? I’m good. Thank you,” she turns down politely, giving an assuring nod to Sungjin.

For once, she wishes Jae would turn the other way so she could confront Wonpil in the most friendliest approach but he didn’t. At least, talking to Jae helps her to bring in peace and calmness in her. Sungjin takes quite a good time buying food as he arrives just when they’re about to leave for the meeting — except his hands show no sight of food or beverage. The only difference is he isn’t alone — Nayeon comes around the same time. Coincidence or not, it’s none of her business.

* * *

When you get yourself familiarized with someone, there are high chances that you will end up seeing each other again. Nina believes in that… but maybe it's not working with the current situation — at least not in the way she wanted to. She hasn't had the chance to see Jae again. The last few weeks were spent on keeping up with her academic paper on media persuasion, going back and forth to the office for consultation, catching up with her classes. Nina had been ditching the editorial chat group and was excused from any meetings with the help of Jaebum. Perhaps, the bright side of having a senior who favors you is that you can excuse yourself when you need to. 

The hustle was worth it despite the relentless mental breakdown and exhaustion. Now, she can finally concentrate on the upcoming project with ease. She has a discussion with Jaebum today. As soon as her last class is dismissed, she rushes to the Language and Literature Studies department to meet him. 

After walking two blocks, the building finally comes to her sight. There are two buildings with the smaller one being the management office and the taller one where the lecture rooms are located. She continues her amble along the corridor before going up to the first floor where Jaebum's class is. 

She twists the door knob to enter, but closes it half-way in immediately. That's when she realizes that fate has decided to play a cruel game by making her bumps into Park Sungjin, just the two of them. 

* * *

_ To: Jaebum _

_ I'm here. Where are you at? _

* * *

She wants to be mad at Jaebum for leaving her alone with Sungjin, but he doesn’t deserve to be blamed over her own personal issue. He doesn’t know anything in the first place. A few seconds later, she hears the door cracks open. Lo and behold, Park Sungjin graces himself upon her with Jaebum's phone in one of his hands as he holds the door using his back. 

"He'll be back. You can come inside and wait if you want to," Sungjin drags the last few words. Is it hesitation? Is he trying to be considerate? 

"Or do you want me to stay outside?" he suggests in consideration. His voice comes out so gingerly as to not make it sound like he's provoking her. It's devastating to see how Sungjin treats him like she hates him, like he was the one to blame. 

She shakes her head, giving him a faint smile before she enters the room. Sungjin slowly moves a step back when he realizes the close distance. There's no one else inside the lecture room. She spots Jaebum's duffel bag is placed on top of the desk where Sungjin is sitting close to. Nina hesitates yet she sits on a chair opposite of him. Sungjin has his backpack opened with full of snacks, and Nina notices he still hasn't changed his favorite snack. 

The room is filled with silence. There's no point convincing themselves how comfortable the silence is when they know how deafening it is in their head. Both of them are looking for the right thing to say but to no avail. Nothing comes to mind that even the simple small talk sounds heavy in their mouth. 

_ How did we end up like this? Are we even friends in this state? _

Her thought brings her back to a post-meeting meal with Jeongyeon and Nayeon the other day. Nina kinda expects them to ask about him since that night. They thought it’s only right to ask her about because they’re close — well, they _ were _close.

_ “So, did Sungjin tell you anything recently? About a girl or anything?” Nayeon asked her. _

_ “Nothing in particular, really. We haven’t been meeting a lot these days,” Nina answered apologetically like she owed her the right answer. _

She didn’t lie about not meeting him. It’s acceptable to talk about it only that much — anything more than that will cause more damage than secure. If they asked her a year ago, maybe she can help. This isn’t an uncommon scenario to her, after all. It happened all the time back then, but it’s different now.

"How's school?" Sungjin breaks the silence, still not moving his gaze from his phone. 

"It's great… I just finished my coursework last week," Nina answers gingerly so he won't hear her shaky voice. Her heart is pounding hard in her chest. She's confused and she doesn't like this. 

It's not the same experience when she was with Jae. With Jae, it's pure; comprise tranquility and freedom. But with Sungjin, it's kind of a roller-coaster experience; nauseating, nerve-wrecking, and confusing. This is why they've been avoiding each other for so long, it hasn't changed — not even a bit.

"You haven't changed," Sungjin chuckles and turns to her in amusement, "You're still the same diligent kid,"

Their eyes meet for the longest time before she breaks away. That pair of eyes have always been holding sincerity, but she's too blinded by her own misconceptions. Perhaps, that's not the only thing that hasn't changed. Much to her dismay, she hasn't grown from the girl she was, a few years ago.

"By the way, where did Jaebum say he was going?"

Jaebum enters the room soon after. Apparently, he wants to hold the meeting somewhere else where they can eat and discuss — in fact, Sungjin is coming along since they have other plans after the discussion. The day couldn’t get any better than this, isn’t it?

Sungjin is driving Jaebum's red sedan car with Jaebum sitting on the shotgun. Jaebum and Sungjin carry the conversation throughout the journey to the café. Nina would occasionally join when she feels the need to. This moment feels rather nostalgic. Car ride. Random conversation. There used to be _ three _people, just like this exact moment. When Jaebum and Sungjin are discussing a topic only they know about, Sungjin would check on her through the rear view mirror. Old habits die hard. Nina keeps her eyes on the side window most of the time like she always does. She loves to stare at the skies and clouds. Sungjin would drive slower so she can enjoy them a little bit longer. Just like the old times.

Sungjin parks the car in front of a small café. A small building looking immaculate with the minimal white walls. There’s a small sign attached on its window glass, standing tall in between a row of other shop lots. The interior is surrounded by pale brown wooden walls with a pot of palm tree placed in every corner of the café. 

It's their go-to café, Jaebum said. Apart from the food, the lack of students there is one of the reasons he enjoys it. The location is quite far from the campus’s vicinity. She totally understands about preferring places where it's unlikely to see any familiar faces. It can get overwhelming to keep seeing university students in every café and restaurant or just about everywhere within their eyesight. 

Jaebum picks a booth seating beside the counter, placing all his belongings before he goes to the washroom. Sungjin scoots to the inner seat beside Jaebum's to make room for their discussion. He has his laptop placed on the table with a notebook on top of it. Once they have placed their order, Nina looks at him. She clenches her fist to muster her courage, but Sungjin beats her up once again. 

Sungjin moves his gaze to her. "Hey, I'm sorry,"

"Hm?”

"I'm sorry for being here. I didn't know Jaebum was going to see you until he told me to look out for any messages from you. I'd have passed if I knew it was you, really" he explains. 

"You'd have passed?" she repeats.

"In your favor," he explains scarcely.

"In my favor?" She has no idea why she keeps repeating his words. Annoyed, maybe.

"Nina, I know that you’ve been running away from me and ignoring me. I get it. I don't blame you if you’re hating me. That's why, I don't want you to get the wrong idea that I'm trying to get in your way,"

"I don't hate you,"

"You don't," it’s a statement rather than a question. Sungjin repeats after her for confirmation — it’s the only thing that matters to him.

"I think we both have been waiting for the right time to talk about this. I'm sorry for giving you the cold shoulder, and running away from you. I admit that," she confesses. "I know I can't keep running away. I mean, look at us now. I just want to tell you that it's not your fault. It's really not,"

"I know," he sighs. "Actually, never mind… we'll talk about this later," his eyes glance to something behind her, giving hint that Jaebum is approaching the table. Sungjin turns to his laptop as Jaebum sits beside him.

It’s better to talk about things while they still have the reason to; while they still have the time to fix things and not leave things in vain. Things happened, but it can be fixed — even if it happened for nothing. Sungjin is right on no one’s at fault. That’s fine, they can always find time to talk about this later.

* * *

By later, they think after the whole discussion, Sungjin would send Jaebum off to his dorm, and they can finish it once and for all. It isn't as easy as they thought. It's Friday, Sungjin almost forgot about the plan they had with the others. 

They have beers and colas arranged on the small coffee table — some chickens. The smell of alcohol faintly lingers around the room. So far, there's nothing wild or out of control happening. She did a few commissions for a private party before, and this is fortunately nothing like she has seen before. They all gather in the same corner. Some of them are drinking by the coffee table, while some are playing games on the couch. When Wonpil sees Sungjin and Nina enter the room together, he looks at them from afar with a can of beer in his hand. He stares at them long enough to get their attention, he mouths 'wow'. 

Both of them ignore him and go separate ways. Sungjin walks to the other side where Jaebum and Mark are while she heads towards the coffee table. Nina takes a quick survey around the room, looking for any clue of what the occasion is about. Neither Sungjin or Jaebum talk about while on their way here.

"We’re not having a party or anything. It’s just a casual hangout, nothing's important," he speaks softly close to her ear, sending tingles down her spine. Jae must have seen her clueless face for him to tell her that.

"I was wondering about that. Thanks," she fiddles her drink aimlessly. 

"I’m sure you can tell. I mean, you’ve been to private parties and all that stuff," he counters, fully aware that Nina is a freelance photographer. 

"Well, they are overhyped,” 

"It shouldn't be that bad, right?"

"I wish. Some places I’ve been to kinda make me wish it was just some fever dream," she shudders at the memory of some guy throwing up in front of her. She was taking pictures of him and his friends. She caught one of him in the midst of throwing up; deleted but still clears in her mind.

He chuckles, taking a sip of the cola in his hand. He’s not much a drinker though he still enjoys it sometimes. He said something about having very low tolerance. She finds it cute.

"I haven't seen you around lately," Jae looks her in the eyes, curious.

"I thought you won't notice," there’s cheekiness in her smile. Nina can be very unpredictable and cheeky at times. One time she shows no definite interest, next thing you know, she will catch you off guard.

"Hard not to," Jae tells her, smiling. 

"Well, I'm flattered,” she laughs. “No worries, we will definitely see each other more often now," says Nina to assure him, raising her can for a toast. It’s driving him crazy how she can say things like this effortlessly. It’s safe to say that she has the upper hand now.

“How do I make sure we will?” he halts playfully.

"Ninaaaaa! My baby!" Jeongyeon hails towards her back, draping her arm around her shoulder. Nina catches her by the waist and puts her on the couch.

"Whoa, chill. Jesus, you're drunk," Jae interjects out of annoyance.

"I'm not. I just miss her," Jeongyeon convinces them despite looking obviously inebriated.

Dowoon and Younghyun come in with a stack of pizzas in their hands. “Pizza’s here. Don’t worry, we can just leave her on the couch,” said Jae.

"Okay, gather around!" Nayeon tells everyone. 

The hours are slowly passing, everyone has started lying around the floor. Dowoon has his head placed on Younghyun’s stomach. Both safely slipped into their dreamland. Jae, Nina, and Wonpil have their backs leaning against the couch. Jeongyeon has been sleeping soundly on the couch since Nina puts her there. The rest are still sitting around with a few slices of pizzas on their plates. They’re talking about their funniest one night stand moments. 

"One time I had a one night stand during a vacation. I met her at the local club. I found out she just engaged," Mark confesses, emotionlessly.

"What? Seriously?” Nayeon asks. “How do you know?”

“She gave me her name. The next day, I randomly looked them up and boom,” Mark showed them a photo of an engagement ring. The girl posted the photo a week after they had their one night stand. “We’re safe. We didn’t know each other,”

"Or you'd have been a dead meat by now," Jae comments.

"Wait, there are people who do it with someone they know?" Nayeon interrogates.

"Isn't it awkward to have one with your friend?" Jeongyeon murmurs as she rubs her eyes.

"Well, no feelings attached. Then, you’re good to go," Jae explains. “Isn’t that right, Younghyun?” he nudges Younghyun with his leg. Younghyun is not new to this, Nina heard. It’s not really surprising considering Younghyun has a distinguished reputation among girls on campus too. He always keeps it hush but the news spread before he knew. Since then, he just let them talk whatever they want about him.

"Sungjin, how about you?" Jaebum averts his eyes to Sungjin. Everyone has their attention on Sungjin. Nina feels her blood rising to her head. All hot and clammy. Is it her or the air-conditioner has stopped working?

"Sorry?" Sungjin puts away his phone on the floor with the screen faced against the floor, giving his full attention.

“Have you had a one night stand with a friend?” Jaebum asks him, this time slower.

“I guess,” Sungjin keeps his eyes on Jaebum. Nina quietly prays Sungjin won’t have his eyes on her, ever, not even for a second. Everyone is surprised that they can’t hide their reaction. It’s not because he had one, rather because he’s Sungjin. Everything about Sungjin should be acknowledged. Nina can see the eagerness in everyone’s faces.

“Did you catch feelings?” Jeongyeon asks.

Sungjin pauses for a moment. He has the answer ready. If he let it out, questions will slowly branch out. He isn’t thinking about himself. He knows he could handle it. He doesn’t give a damn about them either. The name will be kept anonymous. He can give all the answers they need. And they will find out that he was in love, love with complications. Among these people, there’s Nina also waiting for his answer.

Sungjin catches a glance at Nina and he thinks to himself, 

Would it be fair to let her know about his feelings like this?

  
  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We're finally getting closer to finding out the truth lol. I hope you enjoy this chapter!


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter will be a flashback from Sungjin's point of view. Thank you for reading, enjoy! You can expect another update soon!

Puppy loves happened many times during his younger days; first kiss, first date and all that shits teenagers used to make fuss about, he had it before. It all gradually changed from a person to another due to the fickleness of his own heart. One thing that remained consistent was her. He noticed how all the girls he had dated mentioned her name, trying to make him choose between them and Nina. He never understood the rationality of bringing her name into their relationship argument. But of course, he would always choose her. 

All these relationships made him learn all the do’s and don'ts in a relationship, but not many left something impactful; something you’d see in the movies or dramas. Something like a heartbreak. That’s only something he learnt from Nina.

_ Did you catch feelings? _

The question brought back memories of them in high school. It was around the final examination season when they had a long conversation over the phone while they were studying. Initially, Sungjin wasn't into the idea but he gave in.

“My friend told me that the difference between liking and loving someone are if you are experiencing pain that means you're in love, but if your heart flutters, that means you like them,” explained Nina softly. Her hand is no longer writing on the workbook.

She continued after a pause, "What do you think, Sungjin?”

“Well, let’s see,” he responded and looked up on the ceiling, thinking of an answer. “I guess you’ll have to go through it to know. Feelings are not as black and white as we think it is,”

“Have you ever gone through that?” replied Nina.

A tiny pause. “I guess so,”

“I think I’m in love,” she confessed.

“Poor guy. Is he better than me? What happened to only liking me?” he said in a joking manner. They were reminiscing about the time when Nina had admitted to liking him and wanting someone like Sungjin to be her boyfriend. She was still in middle school back then.

He found out that Nina had a crush on a guy from their school. She was so happy about it that he could hear her smiling, but his heart was hurt; it shattered. That's how he knew he was in love with her. He’d like to believe that he was being protective over her — they had known each other since they were little after all.

He first met Nina when he had just moved into the new neighborhood. He found a best friend, who was Nina’s eldest brother. They grew up together, technically. He came over to their house almost everyday. Their mother had treated him like he’s part of the family. That's one of the main reasons why he kept his feelings to himself. Nina was his best friend's youngest sister. He loved her sister so much. In a long-term perspective, he thought about what would happen if they didn't work out? What if it's a bad breakup? What if he hurt her in some way? Sungjin knew well not to cross the line or his friendship will end before he knew. He had these thoughts for quite a while. 

* * *

Last year, Sungjin and her brother got accepted to their respective universities, and they promised to go back home together with any chance that they had. They’d ride the train together from Seoul to their hometown at least twice a month. One day, Sungjin brought them out of town for the first time, showing off his driving license that he recently got. Her brother got it too, not long after. For a moment, it felt like they all had it together as they went through each phase of their life.

Three months into their freshman year, Sungjin received the news of his best friend’s passing. He had been involved in an accident on his way to fetch Nina from her school. He couldn’t come back with him at that time. Nina’s mother was the one who informed him; he could hear Nina’s cry of grief in the background. He ditched his class and went back immediately, taking the earliest train he could find.

The moment he stepped into Nina’s house, Nina, who was a bright, outgoing young lady, had turned quiet. She was kneeling, looking at Sungjin with teary eyes. “He’s gone,” she said. He stayed at her house for the rest of the week. Nina’s mother insisted that he stayed since Nina won’t budge from her room. Nina became sullen and refused to see everyone during the memorial. She would sit near the farthest corner, staring into nothing as her tears trailed down her cheeks quietly. He was sad and in disbelief, but he had no time to fully process everything that happened. Sungjin stayed beside her the whole time.

Just a day before Sungjin went back to Seoul, Nina and him went up to a hill where the three of them used to go. Nina had become emotionally stable by then. Her figure is still a little thinner, but she started eating normally the past few days. It was almost he knew that it would be the last time they would see each other again, he remembered the yellow dress she wore that day with her hair tied in a braid on her side.She was carrying a bouquet of white carnations on her right arm. Once again, he was in love.

They came to a stop where there was a flat ground, a place where they could look down at the whole neighborhood. She sighed, thoughts were whirling inside her head and she was looking for the right to say. “I was a nuisance, wasn’t I?”

“You’re not,” their eyes remained on the spot as though there was a hologram playing all their good memories together.

“I feel like you had to put up with me so many times,” her smile clouded with dejection. “You don’t have to anymore,”

“Why is that?”

“That’s life, I guess. We’re all grown up, becoming some bunch of young adults chasing over things to make us feel relevant in society,” she answered. “I’m going to further my studies soon too, by the way,”

“I can’t see you, then?” Sungjin murmured.

She laughed before slowly wrapping her hand around his arm. She looked at the bouquet on her hand. “Shall we?”

“Sure,”

“We used to go this hill together after school. You loved the sunset and the view. At some point, we all get too caught up with our own things. I just want you to know that I will remember you. Wherever you are, I hope you’re doing well. It's been over a week, I still can't believe you're not with me anymore. We miss you,” Sungjin and Nina looked at each other. 

She squeezed his hand as she continued, “By the way, I'm doing fine now. Sungjin took good care of me while you’re away. I don't know what I will do if he isn't here. I hope you will watch over us happily. I love you,” her voice cracked. Sungjin placed his hand on her shoulder, patting her gently. He took the bouquet from her hand and placed it on the ground.

They walked side by side as they went down the hill. She still had her arm around him, holding each other's hand. “I mean it when I said about you not putting up with me anymore. We can still see each other, though,”

Sungjin waited for her to continue.

“I don’t hate you. I love you. Frankly speaking, you pretty much don’t have reason to come here anymore. You don’t need to watch over me. You have your life in Seoul already,” she explained to him. She was right. Sungjin’s family was no longer living there after he got accepted into his university but he still went back solely because of them. 

“We just have to keep in touch. If you're worried about me meddling in your life. Then, sure,” he informed her. It was his small wish. When she told him about not having to watch over her, he was in despair. It almost felt like she had set a certain boundaries between them.

“It's not that but anyways, we’ll keep in touch,”

They hadn’t been keeping in touch for almost a year since her brother’s passing. He spent most of his time in Seoul too. She had probably got into university by now, he thought. He hasn't heard of her since then, she vanished into thin air. Guess she never loved him like he did.

* * *

Sungjin had been living his life well now just like Nina said. He became well-adjusted to his campus life. He had been doing club gigs and competitions almost every weekend with his newly formed band. Sungjin found himself a girl after a long time, Nayeon. A girl he can talk comfortably with. They met at one of those gigs through some mutual friends. They went for casual meetings once in a while, but most of the time, they hung out together with their friends. 

There was this one day last semester, his band won a competition in one of the underground clubs. The music had turned into the usual night club playlist. He saw someone in the midst of the crowd, a familiar face. _ Nina _. Slender figure. Dark brown hair that is now barely passed her shoulders. A year had passed, and she still remained the same. If there's one thing that had changed, it was the way she carried herself. She looked more mature now. She was in a dark blue off-shoulder dress, dancing with a couple of friends, holding a bottle of beer in her hand. 

It didn't take Sungjin long to notice the three girls having fun in the middle of the dancing crowd. He watched them from afar, particularly on Nina. When his friends were about to leave, he stayed until the girls did. A few moments later, there was a guy approached her — touching her on places that strangers shouldn't. Sungjin got up from his seat — pulling her away, the girls followed suit. 

"Are you girls done? I'm sending you all home," they hesitated at first but Nina's reaction later confirmed Sungjin was no stranger. He was thankful, he couldn’t think of a way to convince them when he approached them. Old instinct.

"Excuse me?" Jamie interjected.

"Sungjin! You're hereeee! I missed you, terribly," she slurred. Her legs were wobbly but Sungjin had his arm firm around her small waist. He gestured to them to go to his car. 

He sent her friends off after asking for her address and passcode. He left his phone number at them in case they thought he was some shady guy. Nina was clinging onto his arm while he was driving, telling him how much she missed him and how her mum kept asking about him over and over. 

When they arrived, she was already in a deep slumber. He carried her inside while she was sleeping, carefully placing her on her bed. He pulled the duvet over her body. She was awake after a few seconds, "Where am I?"

"At your place,”

She shook her head, still trying to process everything that had happened. She was too drunk to think straight. Seeing Sungjin was the last time she could think of. He unfolded the duvet and draped them on top of her body.

"Sungjin," she raised her head and held his hand when he was about to leave. "Where are you going?" she patted the empty side next to her, telling him to sleep there. 

Sungjin obeyed and laid himself next to her. He froze when she moved her body closer to him. "I miss you,"

"I miss you, too," Sungjin placed his hand on top of her head softly and stroked her hair gently, putting her to sleep. 

"You know I purposely ghosted you so you can forget me,"

"Why?" she chuckled out of disbelief. "I'm nothing but a burden. When my brother left us, I kinda thought maybe you’d feel like you need to take care of me. You can't live your life caring about other people's life the whole time. But that’s exactly what my brother told you to do. Didn't he?"

"He did, but I wasn't burdened. Not at all. I care about you. I was worried, okay?" Sungjin answered calmly. 

She turned her body to face him, adjusting her position to match his eye level. "Do you love me, Sungjin?"

_ Always. _It may not be the same he did a few years ago but he still loves her, dearly. 

"I do love you. I always do. Whatever happened to him had nothing to do with how I see you. Why are you pushing me away? I thought we are best friends,"

"We're best friends, that will never change," she whispered.

Eyes gazing between the eyes and those lips, it keeps luring his lips to meet hers. He felt the tension growing, filling the entire room. He looked away. "You're drunk, Nina. You should go to sleep,"

* * *

Sungjin woke up at 6 in the morning and walked to the kitchen to drink some water, feeling all hoarse and dry from drinking last night. When he returned, the table lamp was switched on and Nina was awake. "Where did you go?"

He raised the glass of water, offering her. 

"Not really," she sat up from her bed. She took a sip before she lied down again. Sungjin slipped under the duvet, fixing it to make sure it covered both of their bodies.

"Are you cold?" they lay close enough to feel their breaths brushed each other's cheeks.

"I'm fine,"

When he closed his eyes, he felt her nose ghosted against his. Through the lack of light, his eyes met hers that were open wide before she closed her eyes again as though she did nothing. His heart was beating fast, not knowing if it's a sign or something else. They remained still for a few seconds before his hand crept the side of her jawline. She remained unfazed but her breathing pace grew faster. 

He eventually leaned in to kiss her, giving in to the temptations. She returned the kiss as her arm slowly made its way around his nape, then stroking his hair as they deepened the kiss. The kiss was gentle yet passionate. He tugged on the hem of her dress before his hands went under the fabric, leaving gentle touch on her bare skin from her waist, stomach and her chest. She let out a moan at the slightest touch as though she had longed for it. 

Sungjin wasn't sure if it's the right thing to do, but he made sure to be gentle with every move he made. He looked into her eyes as he explored each part of her body. The next thing you know, they clung onto each other's nakedness. Skin to skin. None of them said a word, just cries of pleasure and heavy breathing. 

They went to sleep right after. Sungjin woke up and instinctively glanced at the clock on the end table next to him. He had been sleeping for half an hour. He checked his phone, showing a few missed calls and texts from his friends after he had disappeared last night. His eyes lowered to a text message sent at 8.25 p.m., just before his performance. It was a long one, his eyes automatically glued on the last words.

* * *

_ Nayeon: _

_ ...I like you _

* * *

He heaved a sigh. What have you done? You slept with your best friend, your first love. Sungjin’s eyes averted to the naked, slim figure next to him. Nina was still sleeping. He realized this wasn't a dream. Best friends? I thought best friends don't wear skin to sleep, he thought. Now, you have someone pouring her heart out for you. In his defense, there were no feelings involved. It was just a spur of the moment. Sungjin had stopped liking her long ago. Whatever that had happened means nothing. 

Sungjin picked up his clothes and got dressed, then tossed her last night dress into the laundry basket. He left her a note with his phone number, he wrote: _ Please call me whenever. _And again, he hadn't heard anything from her since. 

As expected, Sungjin hadn't heard anything from her since then. No text messages. No phone calls. If he were in her shoes, he wouldn’t know what to say too. She had been treating him like a bad habit. They treated each other like strangers. He didn’t blame her. Why do you think he had never talked to her when he had the chance?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The conversation about liking and loving someone was inspired by an excerpt from Jonghyun's Blue Night Radio. I kept the bit for a long time, I'm happy that I can include it in my work.


	6. Chapter 6

"I did, in fact, even before that happened," he emphasizes, eyes slowly scanning each of their faces. He intuitively glance at Nayeon's face first before anyone else. She’s listening intently. Sungjin adds, "We didn't keep in touch, so I moved on. Then we kinda met again then things happened," he nods. 

"So, it's like a closure?" this time Jae's turn to ask him. Nina just watches Sungjin unfolds everything as if her best friend isn't talking about her. 

"No, it's nothing like that," he shakes his head, smiling faintly not to come off too serious. "I don't think there were feelings, so it's not like she owes me anything,"

Perhaps, in an alternate universe, she would blurt out: It was me. It's true, there were no feelings involved so we're good. Right, Sungjin? — then, like how it is in a movie, the camera will pan at everyone's face and stop at Sungjin who might be taken aback but eventually agree. Everyone will laugh along like it's perfectly normal and usual thing to do. 

But in reality, it's really not. 

"Only Sungjin can say things like this in a cool way," Wonpil quietly states. Nina isn't sure who he's talking to.

Naturally, the conversation moves to another topic as everyone keeps bugging Sungjin with more questions like when did this happen? Where is she now? Do you guys still hangout? But in between all these questions, Nina's thoughts remain at a certain spot. She's pondering about what Sungjin has said. Knowing Sungjin, he might say such things to make her feel better. He might be. He might not be. 

"Okay, we should really start cleaning up and get out of here," said Sungjin without further ado, finally standing up and picking up all the trash. 

As per usual, Jeongyeon and Nina ride home together, but Jaebum is left alone — complaining about having to drive since Sungjin isn't with him anymore. In the distance, Nina watches Sungjin walking home with Nayeon in the opposite direction. 

* * *

For the past few days, Nina was contemplating whether or not to text Sungjin. All she did was stare at Sungjin’s phone number, not knowing what to say or whether to call or text him. Yesterday, Nina finally opened up to Jamie and Ayeon. They freaked out but they admitted that they did have some sort of assumption that Nina and Sungjin had a thing. They told her to speak to him first. If she's waiting for the right time, then there's none. Closure may not be necessary but it's better for her to come clean. Obviously, it's easier said than done though.

"Miss, you're blocking the way," a man's voice snaps her out of reverie. 

"Oh, sorry, shit…" she quickly moves aside from a non-existent queue in front of her. She turns to the direction of the voice but only to meet Jae's body towering over her. 

"Jae?"

"Sorry… and hi!" he lets out a silly laugh. "Buying food? Or waiting for class?"

"Neither. You?"

"I was just meeting some friends around here. Do you want to go have lunch with me?" he asks casually. 

"Wait, are you asking me out for lunch?" she's not playing dumb, it's just that sometimes there are things that are too good to be true.

"Yeah… Why? I mean, it's fine if…"

This is one of them. 

"Sure, why not? I don't have anything else to do after this," she cuts him off and gives him an assuring smile when Jae seemingly panicked due to her abrupt question. 

"Okay cool, but not here," he finally relaxed as he adds, "I'll bring you somewhere else," Jae leads her out to the exit door of the cafeteria. 

_ Is this a date? _

They walk along the side way to the common building opposite of the cafeteria. It's a little too sunny today, Jae's tall and lanky figure unintentionally filter out the sunlight piercing right at her. The spontaneity of this sweet gesture makes it even more heart-fluttering. She also notices how he tries to match her pace as she has her eyes on the ground the entire time they're walking. 

"How's the semester so far?" Jae initiates the conversation. 

"Surprisingly good, but it's still too early to tell," she shrugs her shoulders. 

"At least it’s a good start. Are you still doing gigs? Haven't seen one in your feed,"

"Stalker," she baffles.

"Excuse me, I'm a fan!" he exclaims with his hand placed on his chest. 

"Oh, are you now? I'm touched," Nina answers sarcastically. 

"For now, I'm still giving you the benefit of a doubt though," 

"And why is that?"

"I can only give my true verdict once I've seen the outcome for the upcoming concert," he raises his eyebrow at her with a smug look on his face. 

"Demanding," she rolls her eyes at him. "Is this a bribe then? This whole lunch thing,"

"Wait,"

Suddenly, he comes to a stop — just a few more steps to the common building. 

"Are you okay with riding a bike? Sorry, I don't have a car. I should've asked you that first," he says apologetically. 

"What? I don't mind,” she assures him. She doesn’t blame him though, they all know that one person only goes out with someone who owns a car. Judging from his reaction, he may have seen a few of those to say it that way. Imagine turning down this cute guy just because he doesn’t own a car, very saddening.

They have lunch at a Vietnamese restaurant and have bowls of phos with spring rolls as a side dish. The restaurant is at a quieter side of the central area, decorated with fancy and colorful neon signs inside of the property that have phrases like 'I'm falling pho you', ‘good pho you’ and some which are placed on the other section. The seats are already partially occupied when they first enter the restaurant.

The skies slowly grow darker, they decide to take their time to avoid the impending downpour. They continue to carry the conversation as they wait for the rain to stop. 

"I usually go here for some comfort food," said Jae. "Like when I'm stressed, and you know, like nothing's going well. Food is there for me," he explains, pointing at the food on the table.

"I can tell why. The food is great," she compliments. The food is definitely a luxury, the price is twice more expensive than what the cafeteria could offer. “But what do you do when food doesn’t work for you?”

“If it doesn’t work, I will just hang out with my boys. It’s just a form of distraction to me, anyway,”

“Just hangout? Do you talk to them about it?”

“Hm, I do sometimes,” he answers, he seems pensive. “Only with my band members,”

They exchange glances before he continues, “You know how people tell us to open up to someone so we can clear our mind? I wasn’t sure who I should reach out to back then. I was confused about how I actually felt; the emptiness and the helplessness that engulfed me… I was afraid of sounding like I'm not making any sense when I let things out, but they were still there for me,"

"That's good, because I think letting it out is one thing? But having to witness how people react to it is also a whole different thing we have to deal with,"

"Right? I think among us, Sungjin is like a true gentleman — a gentleman is someone who does not what he wants to do but what he needs to do? Something like that,"

She chuckles as she reminiscences about a good memory with Sungjin, “I had a really hard time back then and it made me feel like I have no one else in this world. I thought I really was helpless but when I looked back, Sungjin was right there. It's like he just knew what to do,"

"Now that I think about it, psychology is made for him. He’s good at this kind of stuff, you know?"

"But I have a question though, I just need a different perspective,” she slowly opens up, carefully arranging her words. Jae remains still, sitting a little straighter; all ears as she continues, 

“What would you do if you have a sense of guilt towards something? I just don't know how to approach it. All I've been doing was running. I keep running away. I'm a coward, I know," she lets out a deep sigh. 

"Hey, Nina?" Jae leans forward, his hand intuitively places beside her. "You're not a coward, you're just clueless. The fact that you still want to find ways to fix things because you feel guilty, that's a good thing,"

"I feel like a bad person. I can't help it,"

He leans against his chair again, speaking to her gently and firmly, "What you need is a driving factor, a motivation. Maybe you need to look for the reason why you're feeling a certain way and why you should overcome it; what's on the line?"

_ Their friendship _. 

One night stand happened at the cost of losing their friendship, that’s what she thought. That’s what’s on the line. Although it was consensual and mutual, she still feels off about it. She blamed herself for not being on the right mind, for not thinking long enough about the consequences of fucking your own best friend. It’s embarrassing - not because she did it with Sungjin. It’s just the general idea of fucking your own best friend that seems fucked up.

At 3.15 p.m, the heavy rain finally stops — Jae has to leave for practice at the campus. At first, Nina wants to take a bus since Jae would have to make a second trip if he sends her home, but Jae insists and says "It's not nice for a man to not send his girl home when he's the one who asked her out in the first place," 

_ His girl. _She's too flustered to even fight over it, and Jae is so serious about it that he probably doesn't even realize his own blunder if it's a blunder to begin with. 

Before they begin parting ways, Jae reminds her "If you need someone to accompany you, just tell me. I'll be there,"

"Thank you, but don't worry. I think I can do it. I will give you updates,"

"Whenever you're ready. Thank you for spending your time with me,"

"Don't be flattered, you're just lucky I had some free time," she laughs, turning around and waving her hand. "Thank you for having me too. Be safe,"

* * *

_ eajpark tagged you in their story. _

* * *

"Had fun dating?" Jamie greets her seconds after the door is opened. 

"What do you mean? What date?" Nina asks her, removing her shoes before she walks towards the couch where Jamie is. 

"Sis, in case you forgot — Jae and I are mutually following each other and..." Jamie shows her a photo. It takes Nina a few seconds to recognize herself in that photo. 

"Wait? Waitttttttt!" She takes out her phone from her jeans pocket and checks the photos herself. 

Her hands are cold when she finally realizes Jae has posted a photo of her back with her hand waving to him. He puts a 🤓 as a caption. There's also another photo of the food they are earlier with her ugly smile in it. "Wait, wait! What is the emoji supposed to mean?"

"How would I know?"

"He tagged me. What should I reply?"

Jamie tries to calm her down. "Whoa, whoa… chill. You can just ask him you know? Uh, that question?"

"Do you think he sees me as some boring nerd..." 

"Are you serious?" Jamie rolls her eyes in disbelief. 

* * *

"So, you went to eat pho without telling me? I'm upset," Younghyun complains with his overly done upset face. 

"Why would he?" Wonpil asks nonchalantly. 

"Because I want to eat that too?" Younghyun whines. At this point, Wonpil is confused if his friend is really upset or just trying to pull one of his antics. 

"But you just ate though?" Dowoon interjects. 

"Sorry, Younghyun. I didn't see you guys at the cafeteria so I asked her out," Jae explained to his very upset friend. 

"Or maybe you didn't look around enough because you only saw her," Wonpil murmurs, letting out a small giggle.

After having several rounds of practice, they take a 5-minute break. Dowoon and Wonpil go out to buy some drinks from the vending machine downstairs while Younghyun is heading to the washroom. 

"By the way, I finally asked her out today. It's obviously not a date. I mean, yet but I'm happy," Jae tells Sungjin all of a sudden. He keeps his eyes on the ground while talking. 

Sungjin's face remains unfazed as if he had expected Jae to open up to him. He looks at his friend with a soft smile. "That's good, did it go well?"

"Surprisingly, yes. I still got nervous though," he scratches his head timidly like a little boy in love. "By the way, we kinda talk about you today," Jae peers his eyes at him. 

"Me? Why?" Sungjin furrows his eyebrows. 

"I don't know but it happened. Anyway, I wonder why you never brought her up before. It's kind of weird since you guys seem to be close friends but you never really talked about her," he hedges. 

"No reason. Why? You thought you would have a chance if I told you about her earlier?" he chuckles. 

"Maybe," Jae nods as he strokes his chin. "I know I asked you before this. Be honest, are you okay with me liking her?"

"If you break her heart, I will definitely break your skinny bones. I’m not kidding," Sungjin answers firmly before he lets out a chuckle. It’s quite telling that Nina is someone that he treasures a lot, Jae thought. Sungjin might be laughing but anyone can tell he’s serious about it.

"But who am I to stop you guys from dating? I'm not her brother or anything," Sungjin adds.

"Does she have siblings? You know, just in case, I need to go through someone first before I meet the final boss," he points at Sungjin, referring to him as the final boss.

"That's for you to find out. I mean, I can tell you everything you want to know about her, but where's the fun in that?"

"Of course, I never expect anything less from you,"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This took awhile because I got too caught up with adult life. But anyway, this is something new, isn't it? Isn't it nice to see how their relationships interrelated to the development.


	7. Chapter 7

On Sunday, Jaebum and Nina drive to a hotel for work purposes. She knows about Jaebum working part time as a photographer with an event agency on weekends. He offered her a job to substitute for his colleague who’s still on leave.

They are working for a company dinner — a small scale dinner with renowned figures, they even invited some local press team to cover their stories. If they were smart enough, they could easily pay the press to give them photos too instead of paying someone else to do it. But then, that's the last thing she should be complaining about. 

"You take care of the stage flow. I will take care of the people since they know me, okay?" Jaebum informs her before he approaches a group of people on the main table with a label 'VVIP' in the middle. 

"Sure,"

While she takes over the whole event ceremony, Jaebum is hardly on sight. She looks around for him after the event finished while cursing the hall for being too small and crowded to look for a single soul. She couldn’t even reach him out through a phone call so she waited outside the hall but Jaebum still didn’t show up. When the crowd finally leaves the hall, she goes in again. She spots him sitting around one of the tables. 

What is company dinner without the filthy part of it? There are no parties with no alcohol involved, of course. Jaebum might be having too much fun from it that he is barely sober by the end of this event. He's been joining a table of some group of old men with drinks that hardly leave their hands, each have women on their sides - not really a good sight to see. 

"I'm sorry, but I'll have to take him home," Nina hooks her hand around Jaebum's arm to support him. One of the old men tries to stop her and even has the audacity to touch her arm as she struggles to pick Jaebum and his camera up from his seat. “Don’t touch me,”

“Ugh, I fucking hate filthy old men,” she cusses under her breath.

She walks towards Jaebum's car and grabs the car keys from his blazer. She puts him on the back seat and drives their way home. 

After an hour drive, they finally arrive at their neighborhood at almost 2 in the morning. Nina stops by the roadside and turns on the signal. "Hey, I need to know where your house is,"

Much to her dismay, he’s too drunk to speak or even open his eyes. She wants to be mad at him but she doesn’t even know if she has the right. A few minutes later, Jaebum's phone rings and she takes it out from his blazer to see the caller. 

_ Sungjin is calling… _

She takes a deep breath before she swipes the accept button.

"Hello?"

"Hello? Nina?" Sungjin asks her from the other line.

"Yes, we just got here and I don't know where he lives," she checks Jaebum out in between her answer. 

"Wait? You’re driving? Is he..." Sungjin let out a frustrated sigh before he asks, 

"Where are you now?"

Fortunately, Sungjin just happens to look for Jaebum. He gives her directions to Jaebum’s house. She stays inside the car while waiting for Sungjin to come. When Sungjin sees how drunk Jaebum is, he couldn't hide how angry he is. He may not say it but you can see it through his expression. 

"Can you wait inside? I will go send him upstairs then I'll send you home," he points at his car after he takes Jaebum’s car keys and his belongings from her.

After a few minutes, Sungjin appears again and walks towards the driver seat. Once he gets in, he closes his eyes and takes a deep breath. He's pissed for whatever reason that is. She tries not to speak a word and let him cool off.

"I don't know what the hell is wrong with him, but he shouldn't make you drive all the way here," he finally let everything out and turns to look at her. "I'm sorry about that,"

"No, it's fine," said Nina, assuring him. 

"You still live there?" he speaks softly again as if his anger just vanished into thin air. 

At first, she doesn't get what Sungjin meant by 'there', then she remembers that Sungjin had sent her home once. 

"Oh no, I don't. I moved into my friends' apartment not too long ago. It's closer to the campus," then she proceeds to tell him the directions. 

"The two friends? Ayeon and Jamie?"

"Yes. You still remember their names? That's impressive," she peers at him as he keeps his eyes on the road. 

"Of course. I gave them my number because they thought I was some crazy ex-boyfriend or something," he shakes his head, then he recalls the time when Jamie keeps pestering him to give updates or she will call the police. 

Hearing about his story, she tells Sungjin about how the girls came to her house the next morning after he left the house. Ayeon insisted that she should move in with them after a senior moved out by this semester. They continue to talk about that night without bringing up what actually had happened. 

When they finally arrive in front of her apartment, she takes a step out of the door.

_ What’s on the line? _

_ Our friendship. I don’t want to lose what we have. _

She bows her head, knocking on the glass window. "Do you want to grab a coffee or something? There's a convenience store there,"

* * *

Both of them buy themselves a cup of instant noodles and a bottle of water while Sungjin purchases a cup of coffee. They sit across each other by the huge glass windows where they can look at the deserted street. She glances at the time on her phone screen. 

"Can I ask you something?" she initiates. 

He nods, still indulging his food to his heart's content. 

"Did you mean it when you said that? The things you told us the other day?" she wipes her mouth with a tissue. She notices Sungjin has almost finished his food. 

"Which part?" 

"About how you have moved on and how it was mutual,"

Sungjin suddenly stops eating and looks deeply into her eyes which makes her even more nervous.

"Why would I lie about that?" then he continues, "Shit happened, right? We fucked up and we didn't take things personally. I got over it, at least that's how I feel about it,"

Wonpil was right when he said only Sungjin can look cool saying certain things. One of the reasons is because Sungjin is an honest person, he says things that he wants to say. He doesn't go with the flow, he controls it. It's really disappointing how such trivial things make her forget everything that she knew about Sungjin. 

"I felt the same way, but at the same time, I was scared we weren't on the same page. I couldn't find a way to talk things out, but it turned out I was wrong," she explains. 

Sungjin nods, acknowledging. "I understand. That's why I didn't try to look for you. We're grown up now so I was sure we will find a way to talk it out at some point,"

"Yeah, I don't know why I thought you hated me,"

"Then, let me be honest with you. I did like you back then," Sungjin shrugs his shoulders. He pauses for a moment, taking a mental remark on the situation. When he utters the words, it isn't the same as how it was years ago when he fell in love with her. One thing for sure, he feels a burden left his shoulders. It’s more like telling a story than giving a hopeful confession. He's saying goodbye to his first love by confessing what he should have told her before. Is this what closure is?

He continues to explain, "But I moved on after I went back to Seoul. You cut contact and I thought maybe I should just move on. Then I met Nayeon, we got along well…"

It finally comes to his sense that all the feelings he had for Nina before has been replaced with Nayeon. Perhaps, that was why he never thought too much into what he and Nina had.

"Then I came back and fucked things up," she cuts his line. 

He let out a light laugh, "Well, in some way, yes,”

"Ugh, I'm sorry,"

He gestures his hand to her. "It's not a big deal. I can fix it, now that we come clean,"

"Honestly, apart from my brother, that was also another reason why I wanted to keep a distance between us. I heard about how your ex-girlfriends asked you to choose between me and them? Ridiculous," she shakes her head. "I don't want that to happen ever again. I don't want to get in your way,"

"Nayeon and I are still good, you know. I'm just looking for the right time to tell her,"

Tonight just give him more reason to finally take a step forward with Nayeon. He's sure of his feelings towards her. He'd be lying if he said the reason why he didn't make a reason wasn't because of Nina. It's true. That's only because he wants to make sure his feeling is clear and to know that he's not fooling around. It's not just his heart that he's about to get involved with. Nina may be his first love, but it was all in the past. The woman sitting in front of him now is still his best friend. Nothing will change that.

"Poor girl. Is she better than me? What happened to only liking me?" she mocks Sungjin which catches him by surprise. They burst out laughing at the memory. Once again, they are back to where they left out. Just two best friends who have spent more than half of their lives together. It won’t be just the two of them now, now they have more friends in the scene.

"But jokes aside, Nayeon is nice. I'm not saying this just because she's my club president or for the fact that she's my senior," she points her finger at him when she adds, "She did ask me about you — asking if you’re seeing someone,"

"What did you tell her?"

"I said I don't know. I mean, obviously I don't know shit. When Jeongyeon confided in me, she said she knew you're not the type to let people hang. So, I thought just tell Nayeon to give you time or just talk about it with you,"

"You know me well," Sungjin responded with a satisfied smile. 

"We're still best friends, right?"

"Aren't we always?" 

* * *

_ Nina: _

_ Best friends should keep each other's digits. Thank you for tonight! Goodnight! _

_ Sungjin: _

_ At last! Goodnight. _

* * *

Although she has skipped her morning class, her brain is still finding it hard to function in the afternoon. When she notices the boys are looking at her even from metres away, she knows something isn't right. As the view becomes closer, she spots Jaebum and Sungjin standing nearby talking to each other but left before she manages to get there. Wonpil and Dowoon are sitting on the bench, waving at her. 

"Did Jaebum really make you drive last night?" that's the first thing Wonpil asks her. 

"He was drunk so I drove, on my will, voluntarily" Nina tries to explain on behalf of Jaebum. Of course, she didn’t expect Jaebum to get drunk in the middle of working especially when he tagged her along. Things happened all the time, she thought. 

"You had to, still," Dowoon corrects her. "I don't know you could drive, by the way,"

"Okay, what happened?" she finally surrenders and takes the seat opposite of them. Wonpil and Dowoon look at each other for a moment.

“Sungjin came over to our table, looking pissed at Jaebum and told him off. He deserves that, though,”

“I’ve never seen him acting like that, scary,” Dowoon remarks.

Her eyes widens - not knowing how to react to whatever she’s hearing right now. She doesn’t expect Sungjin would tell Jaebum off like that. On the other hand, she hopes Jaebum doesn’t think of her as a whiny child. She didn’t ask Sungjin to do that.

“Are you okay? I heard the people there are filthy,” Wonpil shows his concern.

“You’re not wrong, but yeah, I’m fine. Thank you,”

* * *

_ Jaebum: _

_ Hey, Nina. I’m sorry about last night. I’ll pick up all the raw files from you later during the meeting. Don’t worry, I’ll do the rest. _

* * *

“That’s interesting,” she mumbles after reading the text message. “I hope you get that message so as to not mess with me in the future,” she looks at them, specifically on Wonpil, with a smug face.

“That’s not fair!” Wonpil objects.

“It’s best friend’s privilege. Get over it!” she cheers.

“Stop fighting,” Dowoon puts up his hands in the air. “Let’s go, we have a class after this,”

Dowoon drags Wonpil from his seat, “I’m Sungjin’s best friend too…” Wonpil whines.

“Bye, Nina!” Dowoon bids her farewell.

* * *

_ Nina: _

_ I took your advice and I think it went well. _

_ Jae: _

_ Good girl, I’m proud of you :) You owe me a treat then _

_ Nina: _

_ Was it part of the agreement? _

_ Jae: _

_ Everything comes with a price. _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here's another update for you guys because I feel like I haven't been posting new one for too long. I hope you guys enjoy this chapter too!
> 
> If you don't mind, please pray that I got accepted for a job at my dream company soon. Thank you so much and have a nice day! xoxo


	8. Chapter 8

Five minutes before the meeting starts, Jaebum enters the meeting room and walks towards Nina's seat. He still looks wasted from whatever he was drinking last night. Instead of the usual relaxed gaze, he looks sullen and sad. She feels Jeongyeon and Nayeon's eyes on both of them. 

"Hey, I just want to say I'm sorry…again," 

"It's fine, things happened. It's not a big deal," she shrugs her shoulders. She turns around and rummages through her backpack. Although what Jaebum did was the stupidest thing to do, she gets over it already. There's no point in arguing over things that happened.

"It is. I made you drive when I'm the one who asked for your help. I made Sungjin drive you home too,"

"Are you done?" she hands in the pendrive to him and says, "I've filtered some of them out. If you need help, just tell me,"

"Thanks," Jaebum takes the pendrive and sits next to Mark. 

Another meeting means another day left until the concert. Today, they're having a meeting at the library since the common rooms are all booked. Everyone has started discussing the final promotion and ticket selling during the final week before the concert, setting out the final seat plan and order list for tasks delegation. 

Jae told her earlier that they had a briefing with the event management team too today. Just the thought of receiving first-hand information from Jae gives her a whole different level of happiness. She manages to receive the exclusivity that she thought was impossible. She didn't ask him where it was held though. Despite the privilege, Nina is still very cautious with things she wants to say or ask. She doesn't want to sound nosy or too curious about his whereabouts. 

"I heard they're having a meeting too," Nina speaks to Nayeon, who is reviewing the meeting flow before she starts. 

"Yeah, they're probably on the lower floor," Nayeon responds. "Want to see them later?"

"Hm? Can we?"

"This is just part of the tentative. I'll make it short," Nayeon rises from her chair to start off the meeting. 

She nods. _ Hm, what are the odds? _

* * *

There are people bustling out of the room Nayeon mentioned earlier. The girls wait in the lounge area in front of the meeting room. The first few people to come out are Younghyun, Wonpil, Dowoon, and Sungjin. 

Nina's eyes continue scanning around her proximity to look for Jae but to no avail. 

_ Bummer. _

"Hey, girls!" Younghyun approaches them with one hand waving at them and another in his pocket. The rest of them follow behind him. 

"I told you guys, it's nothing important. We should've just let Sungjin come alone," Dowoon grumbles in the distance. 

"Where are you guys heading to next?" Sungjin asks the two girls. 

"Can we get something to eat?" Nayeon suggests. Sungjin agrees with love pouring out of his eyes. Nina smiles at the two lovebirds. When Sungjin turns to look at her with a questioning look, she shakes her head. 

"I don't mind," Nina answers. 

"I'll pass, I need to go survey my drum pad. I just got my allowance," Dowoon giggles, putting his hand on Younghyun's shoulder. "Younghyun promised to bring me,"

"Yeah, I need to look for some stuff too. So, I guess… see you later!" Younghyun responds. 

"Okay, then. We can just go out with my car. Let's go,"

Wonpil and Nina look at each other as they follow the love birds. "Hello, Wonpil. How's life?"

"As good as ever. How are you, friend? Did you miss me?"

"Better than ever. Not quite," she squints her eyes. "By the way, where is Jae?"

"Evening class,"

"I see,"

Nina reposts Nayeon's photo of them having lunch together which she captions "double date,"

_ eajpark replied to your story _

* * *

_ eajpark: _

_ Hey, not fair :( _

_ You: _

_ I thought you'd be there. Too bad, you missed out 🤭 _

_ eajpark: _

_ Did you look for me? 😶 _

_ You: _

_ Maybe 👀 _

_ eajpark: _

_ sorry, just got out of class. 😳 _

* * *

Sungjin drops off both Nayeon and Wonpil on the same roadside since the dorms are opposite each other. Looking back, she kind of regretted not staying on campus — cheap rent and food, free laundry and maybe she could bump into each other while going to class. Yes, it's too late to even think about it now. 

"How are things going on with you two?" Sungjin speaks all of a sudden. Nina, who is staring at the view passing by the vehicle, turns her head to him immediately. 

"What do you mean 'you two'?" 

"You and Wonpil?" he asks again. "I just want to know what you think of my friends,"

"Great. Weird guy," she laughs at the mental image of Wonpil and his annoying antics. 

Then, he went from Wonpil to Dowoon and Younghyun. 

"What do you think about Jae?" Sungjin glances at her and back on the road. The question is expected but she still couldn't maintain her expression even when she's trying to play it off. 

"Oh... Well, he's nice, very tall. I think we get along pretty well. We went out together the other day," she explains. 

"Oh really? How was it?"

"It went great! We talked a lot — he did the talk actually, I mostly listened but I had fun. He seems to have a lot to say which is very cute," she reminisced excitedly. "He's enthusiastic, I like that. I'm sure you noticed this too; he blinks a lot that sometimes it looks like he winks at someone,"

Nina ends her sentence with a hum when she realizes she shares too much. She is caught and there's no turning back.

"You like him," Sungjin replies. It is more of a statement than a question. At this point, Nina isn't sure what to respond, so she stays silent but silent is also an answer. 

"Not funny," she protests when her best friend laughs. "Don't tell him,"

"You know I won't," Sungjin answers. "Do you have any plan to tell him,"

"No,"

"What if he likes you too? Who knows,"

"That's not the point. I don't even know if I'm ready for that yet," she states. "Don't you think it's ridiculous that your best friend likes your other best friend? Bandmate?"

"Not really,"

"If I were you in your place, I would probably think so. The possibility of breaking up and what it might do to our friendships… your friendship,"

"That's the thing about you, Nina. You think too far ahead of you that you couldn't enjoy what's in front you. You mentioned about consequences, well, things can happen — but we're all grown up, I won't cut ties with any of you, you guys are my friends unless I don't know, maybe one of you pull out anything stupid… that can be discussed,"

"See?"

"But that's not the point here. Take me and Nayeon as an example, we share the same circle too. I'd be lying if I say I didn't have that kind of thought in mind too, but it's all about how much you're willing to go for someone,"

She remains silent, only the faint sound of the radio filling the background. Sungjin knows how complex her worries are that he's not even slightly surprised when she expresses her concern. Whatever she's feelings are valid, but the least he could do is to help her ease her mind over it. She's always that girl who has so many things in her head. 

Sungjin is always that guy who knows all the rights to say. He's always a step ahead of her in giving her solutions. Sometimes she really wants to prove him wrong and tells him he doesn't know anything, but that day never comes. The thing about Sungjin is that he will never push you to do things, but he will give his insights and it's up to you to do what's right. He's always right and knows her too well. It gets annoying at times. 

"Hey, I get that you're not ready for that yet. I respect that, but I don't want you to think about things that don't matter when the right time comes," Sungjin breaks the silence. 

* * *

_ Jae: _

_ Hey, I need to run some errands. I'll be nearby. Do you want to hang out later? _

_ Nina: _

_ Sure, tell me when you're around. See you! _

* * *

It's only 5.30 p.m when the clouds gradually grow heavier and darker signaling another rainy evening. It's been raining almost every evening lately, some days it lasts after hours but some lasts for the rest of the night. Jae and Nina plan to go out around 8.00 p.m. She restlessly moves around the house. From the living room sitting by the windows, running to check her phone in case Jae decides to take a rain check. 

Luck is on her side this time, she wakes up from her nap to a clear night sky. She changes into a hoodie, grabs the keys and leaves the house at 7.30.

When the elevator doors stretch the view of the street, she isn't expecting Jae would be part of it especially since Jae told her to meet at the laundromat a few shops away from her apartment building. He's all black in a denim jacket paired with a hoodie underneath along with a black jeans and sneakers. He has a laundry bag secured on his lap. 

She fastens her pace towards him, who smiles at her, "I thought we'd see each other at the laundromat?" she greets, instinctively checking the time on her wrist watch in case she got the time wrong. 

"I know, I know. I'm just trying my luck," he answers then tilts his head to the back, gesturing to her to hop on. He gives her the helmet as he starts the engine and waits till she's ready. He turns around when he feels a tap on his shoulder. 

"I'm sorry, I think the buckle is too loose and I don't know how to..." 

"Come," he moves his scooter to the side using his two long legs. 

Nina takes a few steps towards Jae. He giggles as he adjusts the buckle. She tries to look everywhere but at him when he has his face in front of her, up close. It's hard not to notice that cheeky smile on his face — he's probably making fun of her in his head. 

"Sorry, I haven't ridden a bike in a long time,"

Suddenly, both of his hands grasp on both sides of her helmet, making their eyes meet. "Good?" he shakes it a little to see if it's still loose. 

"Thank you," she nods before she finally hops on the back seat. 

* * *

When they enter the shop, Nina spots a few familiar faces which makes her walk with her face down as a reflex. The downside of living in such a community is that you can never really run away from seeing friends from your university. Jae, on the other hand, seems very delighted to bump into a friend at the laundromat. 

He's a head taller than Jae, dresses in a training suit with a duffel bag and laundry bag on both sides of his hands. He might have just finished a workout session from the nearby gym. 

"By the way, this is Nina from the communication department," Jae introduces her to his friend. "Nina, this is my brother from another mother, Matthew. He's from sport science, as you can tell,"

Matthew's bigger, muscular build makes Jae appear tinier than he actually is — making her feel even more like a midget. "Hi, nice to meet you! I'm Nina,"

"Hi Nina, good to see you too," he offers a handshake. "So yeah, I gotta go now. See you at school,"

As Jae busy doing his laundry business, Nina is being drifted away about the girls who he usually hangs out with. Is this whole laundry situation normal for him? She used to fantasize about having a laundry date with a boyfriend — this might be the closest she could get to make it a reality. It's hard to be a hopeless romantic. 

Crushing on someone really makes you question everything and hoping it kinda meets your expectations. It's sorta irrational. It's gonna hurt but you can't really blame it on them — it's not their fault for not meeting your expectations. 

"We have half an hour to spare. Do you want to have dinner first?"

The time is barely past seven in the evening, but the evening skies have washed away into darker hues. It's still drizzling — both Jae and Nina walk with their hoods covering their head. Jae naturally takes the right side of the pavement. Instead of going to restaurants, they head to a street food booth by the roadside. A place where Nina likes to go with Jamie and Ayeon after class. It takes less than five minutes for them to get there. They walk closely side by side as passerbys, from opposite directions, rush their way to the nearest subway station to catch their train. 

"By the way, that's a lot of clothes. Not a good time for them to break, huh?" she asks. 

Earlier, Jae was complaining about how the machines in their laundry room are under maintenance. Students had already occupied the one from the other dormitory block. He couldn't wait, so he decided to go out. 

"Yeah, some are Younghyun's and Wonpil's. I asked them if they want to combine since I can ride my way here," Jae explains. 

"That's kind,"

"Well, it's more of a strategy. A financial strategy. When you share, you pay less," Jae smugs. "Sometimes they leave me out of the division, since I already sacrifice my oil tank to get here,"

"Very convenient. I never thought about savings until I moved out from a studio and started renting a shared house. It's life changing," Nina tells him as they cross the street to get to the booth.

They walk to the order counter to see the menu. There is nervousness creeping inside her stomach as she watches Jae scanning through the menu. There might be some sort of expectations from Jae since she's the one who suggested the place. 

"When did you move here? Did you enjoy it so far?" he continues the conversation from where it left off after they finished making the order.

"I just moved in this semester. I shared it with my friends, so it's great. I still have my own room,"

They sit where Nina always sits with Jamie and Ayeon. It's her first time eating there with a guy, just the two of them. She feels like a high school girl again. 

"You're amazing for keeping up with that independent life,"

"Independent," she echoes. "I think I heard friends call me loner more often than independent. I'm not sure how to feel about that,"

"Synonymously used, I bet. Both being independent and a loner are not a bad thing. In other words, it's a compliment,"

"Is it? I used to question that a lot because they make it seems like it is,"

"Well, for some cases, people like to see it as a bad thing because it's different than what they have in their life. Anything that they can't relate to is bad. Their opinions don't matter, obviously,"

"That's an interesting way to put it. I love the loner days but I love what I have now like having friends around even new friends like you guys," she smiles fondly as she imagines faces of these people she gets to befriended with. She continues, 

"Also, I get to do things I love regularly with a valid reason — the editorial and all that stuff, all at the same time"

"Photography?"

She nods. A middle-aged woman interrupts the conversation momentarily, to serve their table with a plate of dumplings and two bowls of soups. Both of them thank her. 

Then, he continues as his hands are busy arranging the food. "Isn't having it as a side income enough of a valid reason?"

She chuckles when he emphasizes on the word 'valid'. "Yes, but my parents don't really like that idea. Shady stuff happens anywhere but that place? Inevitable,"

"If you need some company, just tell me. I can come with you, you know,"

Oh, to have your crush giving you an assurance and offer you his company sure sounds like a dream. Once you let him be a part of you, it's game over. Even as a friend, it would only make her fall harder for him and it might be a little too late to take everything back.

She starts to feel terrified how this silly crush has slowly become more serious. A part of her wants him to realize that she likes him so he can put a distance to avoid giving the wrong idea but, another part of her is ready to have more of him in her world. Look what a kindness could do to a heart that yearns. 

"That's so sweet," Nina tries to shrug it off as a joke. She takes a sip of her glass of water in between her meal. 

"No, I'm serious," he states in a serious tone. His stern voice catches her off guard. She looks up from her food to his eyes, who has been looking at her. 

"I know," she smiles. "We only have half an hour, so we better be quick," 

It's truly an impulsive gesture — bold and cringy even if one can say so. Maybe Jae is a tad bit embarrassed, but he really meant it when he expressed his concern. He heard about what Sungjin did for her from that night and earlier today. He wishes he could be in Sungjin's place but at the same time, he believes that kind of thing is something that one should earn just like respect and trust. Sungjin knows her for more than half of her life. How is that comparable to someone like him who she just knew for weeks or hardly a month? He doesn't want to force her to rely on him nor create a circumstance where she has to — that's manipulative. It's just a matter of time and space for him to earn her trust. For now, it's best to just keep learning about each other. 

* * *

When they arrive, Wonpil is already there — taking out all of their laundry to move it to the dryer. Wonpil waves at them eagerly. 

"Oh, he's here… Do you want me to send you home now?"

"Sure, I have some work to do, so yeah,"

It doesn't take them long to arrive at her apartment, unfortunately. She should have asked if he wanted to take a walk, that would at least have lasted for a around ten-minute journey home. 

"Goodbye, see you tomorrow," she waves at him. 

"Bye bye, see you,"

When did goodbye become the hardest thing for her? Nina discovers that it was today, right at this moment, at her apartment building, where she stands in front of this guy named Park Jaehyung. At the same moment, she realizes she gives herself the permission to try; to make or break something; to allow herself to get hurt; 

As she walks towards the lobby, her thought wanders to a scene of a movie where the main character makes a bet with themselves to do something. She's motivated to make a foolish bet with herself all of a sudden. 

_ Dear God, if I turn around and he's not there, please guide and make it easy for me to walk away from this hopeless feeling I have in me. _

She halts, slowly turns around with her eyes shut. It's just a silly bet but her heart is beating fast. Should she just turn back and walk her way home? What is she so afraid of? When she finally opens her eyes, she nearly bumps into a stranger. 

"Watch where you're going!" the stranger scolds her. She was confused and hurt. Was she hurt by the scolding? Not really, in fact what he said barely even registers inside her head. She remains on her spot, then she thinks to herself. 

_ Did he leave already? _

Just as the stranger walks away, she hears Jae calling out her name. 

_ No way… _

Jae rushes towards her with a worried face. He slows down his pace halfway, glancing at the stranger. He must have heard the stranger scolding her. 

"Hey, are you okay?"

She nods, then her eyes averts to his right hand. 

"By the way, you forgot your take out," Jae shows her the take out she ordered for Jamie and Ayeon earlier. 

"Oh yeah, sorry," she laughs awkwardly as she takes the food. "Thank you,"

They stand there, looking at each other for seconds which then turns into a minute. Everything else in the background is blurry and in fast forward. Both of them seem to still have many things to say yet none of them has the guts to spill. 

Jae couldn't keep his smile to himself for some reason. Moments like these little things are what he craves for. Even so, it's still the time to say goodbye — and everytime it happens, he prays that they will keep crossing paths more than ever. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello readers, 
> 
> Hope everyone stays safe and stay home (when you can) during this crucial time. Let's pray everything will be over soon. Take care x


	9. Chapter 9

Jae is taking his sweet time, strumming guitar to the tunes playing in his head on a Tuesday afternoon. He’s alone in his room while everyone has already gone to class. It’s just one of those days. 

But his peaceful afternoon doesn’t last long when he hears someone knock on the door. Sungjin barges into his and Younghyun's room. He plops himself on Younghyun's bed like it's the most natural thing to do.

Jae remains unfazed at his presence despite walking in like an intruder. They have gotten used to it after a few semesters together. Knocking is a must but they don’t wait for the other person to answer. They simply just open the door themselves seconds after they knock. Well, at least they knock, right?

Have you asked her yet?'' That's the first thing Sungjin asked as soon as he entered the room.

Silent.

Sungjin raises his head towards Jae, who’s sitting near the study table across him. "Wait, you didn't ask her yet? About this Friday night?"

Jae's hand stops plucking the guitar strings. His mind is trying to make up a possible reasoning or excuse to his best friend's question. 

"I don't know, I'm sure she knew by now, right?" and that's all Jae could come out with. 

"Nayeon is not going. I don't know about Jeongyeon," Sungjin mutters.

Silent. 

"But you know what, I'm sure Nina would like it if you invite her first hand, you know?" he proceeds. 

"How do you know?"

Sungjin's phone rings before he could even answer Jae's question. Judging from the first seconds of cursing, Jae can tell it's Younghyun on the other line. Sungjin stands up immediately, resigns from the room. 

Jae slides into his bed, reaching for his phone from under his pillow. He opens the chat from last time, staring at the message box. Then, he carefully starts typing. 

* * *

_Jae: _   
_Hey, are you free on Friday night? We have a show that starts at 8. Appreciate it if you could come._

_Nina: _   
_Oh, sure! I'd love to. Can I bring my friends?_

_Jae: _   
_No problem. Our turn is at 11, so you can come later if you want._

_Nina: _   
_Sure!_

* * *

Nina keeps smiling to herself throughout the short conversation. Her attempt to not look too excited failed when Ayeon scoots closer to take a peek at her phone screen. “What’s so funny?”

"Wait, are you guys free this Friday night?" Nina put her phone closer to her chest, still smiling from ear to ear.

"So far? Yes,” Jamie looks at her, anticipating. Ayeon nods.

"Jae invited me to see his show,” Nina responds in between squealing and talking. “I told him I will bring you guys because I thought it’d be fun if we can go together," Nina gives them a pleading face. 

"Okay, I will go! I mean, when was the last time we went to gigs together?”

“You could’ve just said that you want to see Younghyun,” Jamie scoffs.

“Well, that’s just a bonus,”

"Shopping after tomorrow's class?" Jamie chirps in. 

"Yeay!" Nina claps her hands.

* * *

In a sea of people filling the main stage, there are Nina, Jamie and Ayeon jumping and dancing under the colorful flashing lights. The crowd sings to every song that is playing on stage, loud enough to resonate through the small building. After the emcee announced a break, the crowd scatters around - some head towards the drinking bar for some refreshment, some just sit around the nearby seats and some just stand there.

Nina goes back to their seats while Ayeon and Jamie buy some drinks. Jeongyeon, who just arrives, jogs towards Nina as soon as she sees her. 

"Nina, you came!" Jeongyeon slides her arm around Nina's shoulder once she sees her. "Did you come alone?"

"I came with my friends. They went to buy some drinks,” Nina gives her a side hug.

"What time did you come? Did you meet them yet?” Jeongyeon settles in a seat next to her while her eyes linger around, looking for any sign of them.

She shakes her head. "We're here since 8 though,"

Speak of the devil. 

The boys appear from backstage - Jaebum and Mark are also seen in the distance. Sungjin approaches their table while Jaebum, Mark, Younghyun and Dowoon sit on the table next to theirs.

"Did you guys come together?" Sungjin sits across Nina. 

"I just got here," Jeongyeon replies briefly.

"I came with them," Nina points at Jamie and Ayeon who come back with some drinks to themselves.

"Hi, Sungjin. Long time no see, huh?" Jamie joins in the conversation. She even gives him a wink, a very meaningful wink. 

"Hi! Jamie and Ayeon, right? Thank you for coming," 

Jae comes in later with Wonpil. He's wearing a blue denim with a plain red shirt underneath it. He waves at Nina, beaming a smile upon exchanging eye contact with her.

"Thank you for coming," Jae greets her along with Jamie and Ayeon. 

Naturally, he stands between Sungjin and Nina. Sitting on a bar stool has somewhat given her access to appreciate Jae's facial features closely, especially when he leans forwards on the table. She notices a few moles on his face — also one that hides behind the ear. 

"We saw you girls just now," suddenly Jae turns to look at her.

"Wait, really?" she looks puzzled. She turns to Sungjin for some confirmation, but he gives a smile in return. 

"We were watching from the viewing deck," he points at the deck and the girls' eyes follow. 

Sungjin laughed, "You guys seems to really have fun, so we didn't bother to call for you,"

"No way," she covers half of her face with her hands, shocked. 

"Ah, we probably look like we're dying.... But we're dying of fun, right?" Ayeon continues. 

"If you see us later when you get on stage, don't mind us. We're just in our true nature," Jamie adds in. 

"You guys go to gigs a lot?" Jae asks them out of curiosity. 

"We do. We love them," Nina says, excitedly. 

"Well, fun fact! We actually met at a music festival," Jamie suddenly opens up about how they met each other. 

It all started during their first semester, not too long ago, Nina came with her classmate to a music festival that happened at their campus. Jamie and Ayeon came together. Nina wanted to share some photos she took of them. They exchanged numbers and the rest is history.

"So, that's why I just had to bring them along with me tonight," Nina explains. 

"It's cool, though. I really like that. I mean, you can look forward to ours. I can guarantee you guys will have fun," Jae assures them confidently. 

Most of the time, he seems pretty laid-back and goofy but tonight, he's a completely different person from his manner to his visage. The guy standing next to her is confident and serious like an alter ego, a person who devours on adrenaline rush and crowd cheers.

Hearing how confident he was is enough to make her heart pounds. There's nothing more beautiful than seeing a confident person who holds pride in the things he does. It's her ultimate weakness. How could you not love that about someone? 

"Yeah That's kind of like our thing. To have fun," Sungjin further explains.

"Well, we'll look forward to it," Nina answers in excitement. 

"Excuse us, we need to go to the washroom. See you," Ayeon pushes Jamie to make a leave. 

"Yeah, I need to get some drinks. I'll be back," Sungjin excuses himself. Jeongyeon is busy talking to the rest of the boys, which leaves the two of them together while the rest are on the other table. 

Nina starts to feel panicked a little. Then, the camera strap hanging around her wrist caught Jae's attention. "Oh, is that a film camera?"

"Yeah, I always bring this one for live shows. It's the same one I took of them when we first met," she refers to Jamie and Ayeon. 

He nods, seemingly fascinated to see an analog camera being used. He knew that it's kind of a thing but he never saw one in real life. 

Then, she continues, "Do you want to try to take a photo?" 

"Sorry, what?" Jae leans his ear closer. 

Nina is slightly taken aback by the sudden intrusion of personal space. The close distance is close enough for his perfume scent to linger around her. 

"Do you want to try?" she repeats, showing him the camera. She takes the strap off her wrist and gives it to him.

His lips curve into a wide smile, happily accepting the camera. "Sure, it looks cool,"

He examines the camera for good seconds before he leans towards her again. "So, how does this work?"

"This is the viewfinder. This is the flash. So, all you have to do is press the shutter button on the top to take a picture," she explains to him as she points at some of its body parts. 

"Oh, this one," he takes a close up on the camera's body like a curious child getting their first toy. 

"This is where you turn the film roll, so you can take a new one," she points at another button on the camera. 

"Let me take one of you," he takes a few steps back. 

"Wait, me?" she points at herself, laughing nervously. "Okay,"

Her body suddenly stops functioning. Her last brain cells just had to make her props her chin with her hand, smiling as the camera flashes at her. 

"Nice, but we can't see them right away, right?" he returns to stand next to her again. 

"Yeah, which is good because none of us get to see how ugly I look," she jokes as she rolls her eyes. 

"Well, I disagree. You look beautiful," he differs.

"Sounds quite serious for a joke, eh?" she squints her eyes at him. That's when he realizes he has been looking at her the whole time. Have those pools of eyes always been this gentle? 

"Because it's not. I'm serious," his eyes soften when her eyes look into his.

This is it. 

This is where Nina falls into a bottomless pit of her own feelings and wishful thinking. She knows she will continue to do so until she finally hits the hard ground called the painful reality. 

"Hey, let's take a picture with everyone," She slowly drops her gaze elsewhere when she feels her cheeks grow warmer. 

Jamie and Ayeon come back just in time to take a photo. She gathers everyone around while Jae turns the roll button.

"1,2,3!"

* * *

The four girls along with Jaebum and Mark went into the crowd right after the boys went back to the waiting room. They manage to squeeze themselves in the middle of the crowd, enough for them to see the stage clearly. Nina feels her heart thumping so hard as the emcee starts reading his cue for the next performance. 

The crowd's cheers and screams fill the entire underground area as soon as the band appears on stage with their instruments. Jae is there, eyes looking for her — though there are other people standing in front of him, he's quick to notice her from the middle row. He waves at them before all the lights are turned off except the one on Sungjin. 

"Hello, everyone, we're Day6," Sungjin starts the greeting while the others are setting up the stage. "Thank you for coming here tonight. Are you guys having fun?"

The audience unanimously shouted 'yes'. Nina screams as loud as she can to show support for her best friend. 

"Then, let's get crazy again for the last segment. Are you guys ready?" Sungjin's eyes are firing up as he raises his voice. 

The lights are flashing all at once in different hues which lift everyone's spirit as soon as the music sneaks in. 

"Let's go!" Younghyun screams. 

The spotlight shines on Dowoon as he starts playing the drum to the beats of 'Locked Out of Heaven'. Everyone starts losing themselves to the song, jumping around while singing along to each word of the lyrics. 

_You make me feel like_   
_I've been locked out of heaven _   
_For too long _

She couldn't take her eyes off Jae during the whole performance. How he looks like he gives his entire soul to perform. The way their eyes linger on the crowd with that satisfied smile every time they cheer and sing along with them. Looking at how they're having fun, you just can't help but to sing along and enjoy them.

With every chance she gets, she will take a shot of them on stage while still enjoying their performance.

They move to a more groovy song now. Everyone starts swaying their bodies together. The song starts off with Jae singing his line, 

_If you ever find yourself stuck in the middle of the sea,_   
_I'll sail the world to find you_   
_If you ever find yourself lost in the dark and you can't see,_   
_I'll be the light to guide you _

Jae looks at Nina directly while singing the lyrics. She couldn't be more doubtful, but still she smiles ever so brightly while singing along the same lines — looking at each other. Jamie nudges her shoulder. Her friend saw it too, but Nina couldn't bring it up. She doesn't dare to.

Having someone you like showing her support and excitement sure gives a different level of contentment, isn't it? Jae thought so. 

His past relationships taught him that girlfriends love watching you sing but only to themselves at some extent. At first, he understood that an overwhelming presence of girls around them especially in places like this could lead to jealousy — which is given. It's definitely understandable. 

They will say things like, _'this place doesn't suit you', 'I don't like it', 'you should only sing for me and only me'_ and other things. Then, they will make him choose between them and singing — which is quite contradicting given that they admitted that they enjoyed seeing him sing. Telling him to quit the band is the breaking point of all. That's how everything went in vain. 

Since then, he never really liked the idea of having his partner to watch their show because he somehow knows how the cycle will be. Hence, why he hesitated about inviting Nina despite them not having any romantic relationship to begin with. Thus, he becomes hopeful. Learning the fact that she loves live music really isn't helping. It gets his hopes up. 

But that moment right there? It's beautiful. He hates how beautiful it is that he could hardly take his eyes off her from the crowd. His pessimistic side could've said that she will definitely change at some point but there's a bigger part of him that is willing to reach out for her. 

_I'm on my way_   
_Driving at ninety down those country lanes_   
_Singing to "Tiny Dancer"_   
_And I miss the way you make me feel, and it's real_   
_We watched the sunset over the castle on the hill_

* * *

Jamie seems to be all drunk after the last performer concluded the show, reeling her way back to the high table. Ayeon and Nina help him walk to the table — they look at each other. They know better not to drink too much though both of them have been feeling quite tipsy. 

As they settled on their seats, Jeongyeon, Younghyun and Wonpil came back at the same time. 

"Man, I'm sweating," Younghyun whines as he furiously fanning himself. He has a shirt unbuttoned halfway, revealing his drenched shirt. 

"You guys were amazing! Are you guys bringing the same setlist for the concert?" Jeongyeon puts her arms around Wonpil and Younghyun. 

"That's a secret," Younghyun wiggles his eyebrows. 

"I hope it's as good as this one," she lets go of them and sits next to Jamie, who has her head sinking on the table.

"It better be," Nina joins in while she's rubbing Jamie's back. "Are you guys going back to campus after this?"

"Nah, we usually just stay a night at Sungjin's. It's better to stay out than to ruin your record for breaking the curfew," Wonpil utters. "Is your friend okay?"

"She's fine. She just drank too, I guess," Nina smacks her lips. "Do you think we should get going?" Nina turns to Ayeon. 

"I can send you guys home since we're heading the same way, anyway," Jeongyeon offers them.

"Thanks," Nina glances at Wonpil and Younghyun at the same time. "Then, see you guys next week?"

"See you, then. Be safe," Younghyun turns towards Ayeon. "and thank you for coming,"

"Bye guys," Nina wraps her arm around Jamie's waist for support. Apart from carrying Jamie, the reluctance to leave the place makes every step she takes feels heavier.

Sungjin, Jae and Dowoon finally resign from the backstage, not long after the girls have left the club. 

"Eh? Did the others leave already?" Dowoon points it out. Sungjin and Jae's eyes trail down the direction Dowoon is pointing. Jae looks around them when he sees there are only Younghyun and Wonpil sitting near the high tables. 

"Where did they go?" Dowoon asks again when they reach the table. 

"Oh, they went home," Wonpil responds. 

"One of them got too drunk," Younghyun seems to never leave a drink off his hand except when he performed earlier. 

Sungjin glances over at Jae as he nods, "Then, shall we leave now?"

"Oh, you have it already" Younghyun hovers his eyes at the envelope in Sungjin's hand. 

Sungjin shows the brown envelope that has their payment in it. "Let me call Jaebum for a sec,"

* * *

After putting Jamie to sleep and taking a shower, Nina finds time and courage to text him. At first, she thought it's unnecessary, but there's nothing wrong with showing some 'courtesy', right? 

It's almost 1 in the morning, they may have still been hanging out somewhere. She checks out the timeline to see if any of the boys updates something. 

Of course, they're still hanging out… and drinking. Mark posted it 6 minutes ago.

She takes a deep breath before she starts typing; 

* * *

Nina:   
Hello, it's been a while since me and the girls had that much fun together. You guys were amazing. Sorry that we had to leave early. 

* * *

She taps the 'send' button and locks her phone — buries her head on her pile of pillows. 

Then, she feels her phone buzzes, signaling a new message. 

* * *

Jae:   
No worries. Thank you for coming! Really appreciate it 🙏🏼

Nina:   
Have a good rest. Good night! 🌙 

* * *

This time, she heaves a sigh of relief. Although she still feels slightly bummed that they had to go home early, at least they get to text before she goes to sleep. 

She sleeps with a smile plastered on her face. Her phone buzzed again while she's sleeping. 

* * *

Jae:   
Good night, beautiful⭐ 

* * *

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you guys have fun reading this one 💕 
> 
> Yes, I still remember about the concert. It's safe to say, we're closer to the end of this story as the impending concert gets closer to its D-day. 😁


End file.
